Resistance Is Futile
by headoverhook
Summary: Even though Mark let her go and Lexie walked away the love is still there. They have tried to ignore the feelings and stay away from each other. But sometimes fate takes a different course than expected. COMPLETE
1. The elevator

**Hello everybody! This is my first fanfiction for Mark and Lexie. My favorite Grey's couple by far. As always an idea popped into my head and I had to put it on paper. Usually I need some time to get into the characters. So this is only me sticking one toe carefully into unknown water. So I quote Mark here. I'm still learning. I hope you enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. I'm just playing around with them.**

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><p><strong>Chapter 1: The elevator<strong>

Not again. Mark stopped dead in his tracks only one step inside of the elevator when he looked up from his iPhone to greet the other person who was already standing in a corner of the cabin. Her brown eyes locked with his causing him to hold his breath when he felt like someone just punched him in his gut. He had avoided such situations over the last two months. He didn't want to be alone with her. He didn't trust himself around her.

But as he turned around determined to leave her alone the doors shut in front of his eyes. He inwardly cursed. They were trapped in the elevator. Again. But this time he remained at the doors. His eyes were glued to the metal in front of him. He tried to concentrate on something else to block out that she was standing only a few feet away from him. Mark clenched his teeth until they started to hurt biting his tongue until he tasted blood to avoid spilling his feelings out to her. She didn't want to hear them and he promised.

Lexie was staring at his back. She could see how tense his shoulders were how uncomfortable he felt alone with her in the elevator. She couldn't blame him. She made it clear that he shouldn't follow her anymore. Actually she plainly told him to stop caring about her. This was the first time in two months that they were alone in a room together. That it was the elevator was fitting considering the last time they found themselves in this particular situation.

As the air in the cabin was growing thicker and thicker with tension by each passing second Mark's back in front of her suddenly triggered something in her photographic memory and a conversation with Meredith popped into her head. Totally inappropriate right now. Mark didn't even want to talk to her. A shiver ran down her spine as she imagined Mark and herself engaging in such an encounter.

She straightened when she realized how wrong it was to even think about it. She didn't have the right for such thoughts and she tried to ignore the warm feeling it caused in her. But she couldn't stand the silence any longer and took this chance for an opening well aware that she was playing with fire not exactly certain why she couldn't resist and what was even more confusing she didn't want to resist.

Mark suppressed the urge to tap with his foot impatiently on the ground. His head started to pound because of the taut muscles between his shoulders. He wanted to get out of here before he would do something he would regret afterwards. What made it even worse was the fact that he could smell her. He silently breathed in deeply overwhelmed by the rush of memories her scent evoked in him. Struggling to hold his emotions in check he begged the elevator silently to move faster to the fifth floor. But when they reached the first floor he suddenly heard Lexie's voice behind him.

"Has Derek ever told you about what happened between Meredith and him in the elevator?"

Mark slowly turned around looking at her astounded not quite sure if she had really asked him a question or if he just imagined it. But she looked straight into his eyes and he couldn't avoid that his heart skipped a beat. He had stayed true to his words even if it almost killed him. He had let her go.

On a personal level he had ignored her the last two months. From the moment she left him in front of the vending machine he was only her teacher. Nothing more. But it was damn hard to stay professional when she looked at him with these dark brown eyes. Not to mention that she still admired him as a surgeon. She always had; already from the beginning and she said it so herself when she surprised him in his hotel room. The memories were overflowing his brain but he shut them down before he would grab her and throw her at the wall breaking the promise he had given her. Taking in a deep breath he concentrated on the question she asked him remembering only one conversation with Derek about the elevator.

"The proposal? Yes, he did."

Mark had no idea why she asked him such a strange question but judging by the frown that appeared between her brows she was talking about something else entirely.

"No. Not the proposal. I mean when they were talking about ferry boats, about sexual harassment and drawing a line. I'm sure he talked about it to you. But maybe he didn't. Because back then you weren't speaking to each other because of Addison. Maybe he didn't mention it to you. Even though you are best friends and should have talked about it. But maybe Derek forgot to mention it. It was before Addison returned and wanted him back. Before you came to Seattle."

Mark looked utterly confused while Lexie was rambling away as usual. But even now when he had no clue what the whole conversation was about he felt a tug at his heart. She was beautiful when she was in one of her rambling fits. He hadn't told her that it was one of the main reasons he had fallen in love with her and he wouldn't say it out loud because it sounded crazy. But he was in love with a Grey and craziness was considered normal regarding the female part of this family. Alone the fact of loving a Grey could get you into the psych ward. Derek would agree with him wholeheartedly. Before he lost his train of thought completely Mark hold up one hand stopping Lexie in midsentence intent to find out what she was really talking about.

"What are you talking ..." But then it suddenly dawned on him and even though he tried to suppress the grin he couldn't help himself when he remembered what Derek told him about this infamous elevator ride. "Oh, that one." Involuntarily his last sentence sounded somehow seductively. He blamed the pictures that popped up in his head when he finally realized that she was talking about the kiss. And he wasn't thinking about Meredith and Derek. He had a clear picture in his head of Lexie. Her legs wrapped around his waist. He shook his head to get rid of this particular picture trying to stay focused on the conversation hoping that his face didn't show his thoughts.

Lexie averted her gaze to the ground suddenly scolding herself that she brought up the subject. She should have kept her mouth shut. Just for once. She was walking on thin ice here. There was no denying that her question somehow shifted the mood entirely. With only three words in this incredible husky tone the uncomfortable silence from just a minute ago was replaced by sexual tension.

The walls she had built around her heart started to crack and there was no way she could stop it. She feared to look up, feared to meet his gaze certain that it would only destroy the last bits of her will power to stay away from him. She shifted tensely from one foot to another prolonging the inevitable. Seeing her that nervous caused Mark's smile to broaden even further. She would possibly flat out deny it but the sexual attraction was as strong as ever. But before she looked up he managed to put on a straight face. He wouldn't make it that easy for her.

When Lexie looked into his eyes her heart began to flutter. She was surprised that she was still able to form words not to mention speaking them out loud without the slightest hint of her inner turmoil tinting her voice. "Yeah. That one." Lexie knew she wouldn't last long and when she saw that a smirk tugged at the corner of his mouth a sudden heat wave shot straight to her core.

"Why did you bring it up?" He put his hand in his pockets trying to look casually as if he wasn't really interested in her answer. But he couldn't ignore the small flame of hope that was rising in his chest.

"I don't know." Lexie felt like a deer caught in the headlights. She was questioned her sanity. Maybe she should have stayed in the psych ward considering the mess she had dragged herself into. She asked him to stay away from her and now she was the one who started it again.

"You don't know? You mean you did find it too quiet in here so you wanted to share with me the first thing that came to your mind?" The smirk on his face grew wider and his eyes began to sparkle with amusement.

"Something like that." Lexie gulped hard. Mark's smile made her tingle in all the right places or wrong places depending on whether she wanted them to tingle or not. She hadn't decided yet.

"And the first thing that came to your mind was Derek and Meredith?" Lexie knew that he only wanted to tease her. It made her aware how much she missed the banter they had engaged so often in the past especially at the beginning of their relationship when they sneaked around in the hospital. Lexie let her gaze drop again not wanting Mark to see the longing in her eyes before she replied with an unsure voice.

"It's not that strange. After all she is my sister and he my brother-in-law. Isn't he?"

"Right!" Mark took one step further into her direction before he leaned against the wall only a few feet away from her. "But why mention to me this episode of their relationship? We are standing in an elevator right now."

Lexie could hear how much he enjoyed this but hearing him stating the obvious made her want to smack him. "Of course I know that we are standing in an elevator right now. I'm not stupid. Well, not that stupid. Or so I hope." Lexie muttered to herself before she looked up again seeing Mark leaning at the wall.

The sudden rush of desire that shot through her almost knocked her flat in front of his feet. She had been always attracted to him but when he let her go for real it only backfired. Lexie thought she could forget him but now he seemed even sexier. If he wouldn't look that sexy it would have been easier to suppress the feelings she didn't want to feel anymore. But of course he was McSteamy. No woman could resist him. She knew exactly what was hidden under the scrubs. Her hands were itching to touch the smooth muscles of his chest and six pack following the hairline over his stomach until it disappeared beneath his pants. She snapped her eyes back to his face when she caught herself staring at his midsection. "Where was I?"

"You and me. Standing in an elevator together." Of course Mark was well aware what her wandering eyes meant. After all they had been a couple for a fairly amount of time and he knew this look. She even licked her lips making him almost forget that he let her go. He wanted nothing more than to lift her up in his arms and to kiss her. But she had to make the first move. She had to choose to come back to him. Not the other way around.

"Right." She paused and licked her lips again causing him to clench his hands into fists in his pockets because the urge to close the space between them was almost overpowering him. It took all his strength to withstand as the well known desire rushed through his veins. She aroused him only by standing there. But it was always like that with her. He only needed to see her up close and almost lost control. He had never felt like that with another woman and he was fairly sure there would never be any other woman who could make him feel that way. Nonetheless he was able to speak to her in a nonchalant voice as if she didn't affect him in any way.

"I'm asking you again. Why did you bring it up?"

"You really want to hear me say it? You know what I'm talking about but you won't say it out loud? You're unbelievable." Lexie paced in front of him while she emphasized every word with exasperated movements of her hands. "Why am I the one who have to do it? But it's all your fault. You with your eyes that burn down all my clothes only by staring at me. When you look at me I feel always naked. Not that I would mind so much. I mean when we were together. I did mind when I was together with Jackson. Of course, I did."

That got his attention immediately. Of course it flattered his manly ego that he was able to drive her crazy with only looking at her and he was guilty as charged. He undressed her with his eyes on many occasions when they were together and even a few times when they were separated. But why was she talking about Jackson in the past tense? Did he miss something? Weren't they together anymore? The flame of hope in his chest grew stronger with this new information but he had to be sure.

"Wait." Mark hadn't even realized that he approached her when he put a finger to her lips to stop her from rambling further. They locked eyes and remembered the last time he put his finger to her lips in the same manner. Lexie's eyes got soft when she recollected his face still bruised because of the fight he had with Derek. Because of her. Mark wasn't immune to the memories either. He meant it back then and it was still true now. She was the one who put him back together. Without her something was missing. He cleared his throat to get a grip on his feelings but this time his voice betrayed him because he wasn't able to keep his emotions out of it and he didn't really care at the moment if she could hear how much her answer would mean to him. "When you were together with Jackson?"

Only then Lexie realized what she involuntarily spilled out. She only broke up with Jackson a few days ago and until now no one knew about it. But she wasn't able to lie to Mark. Especially when he looked at her with those blue eyes that seemed to touch her soul without even trying.

"We broke up."

Lexie shuddered slightly when she admitted to herself for the first time since the baby fiasco that she fooled herself. She would never be able to love someone else as she loved him. It wasn't only the sex. Even if the sex was mind-blowingly fantastic. Of course sometimes love wasn't enough. She had heard that often enough and she even believed it. But now after months in which Mark almost ignored her and treated her as any other resident she couldn't deny it any longer.

She meant it when she told him that she would always love him. But she lied to him and herself when she told him that he wasn't able to make her happy. Because the truth was that she wasn't able to be happy without him. She tried but failed miserably.

It needed another man to cast the first doubts. What made it even worse was the fact that her own boyfriend told her. Actually she wasn't the one who broke up with him. It was Jackson who asked her again if they should stay in a relationship when she clearly was still in love with Mark. He exploded when he caught her one day staring longingly at Mark. Again. She wasn't even aware that she watched Mark. She stayed in denial and they had a big fight about it which ended their relationship. And now she was standing here in the elevator with Mark and she felt more alive than in months. It scared her but it also made the decision easier what she wanted to do next.

Lexie took in a deep breath before she stepped away from him. Mark closed his eyes briefly when she moved out of his sight. It still hurt like hell. He thought he was done with this but she was still able to raise hope in him one second crushing it in the next. But when he felt the elevator stop he opened his eyes immediately and before he could turn around he felt her hand at his back. She trailed her fingers up his spine and when he reached his neck she whispered in a husky voice that made him trembling.

"Turn around, Mark."

He tried desperately to not hope for something that might not happen and so he pushed his hands in the wall to stop them from shaking violently before he responded with a chocked voice.

"Why?"

"Because I want to see your face."

Lexie took a step askew so that she was standing next to him. She raised her hand and trailed her finger along his jaw.

"Please, Mark."

Mark was never able to resist her. Not in the past and not now. Especially when she touched him. So he turned around to face her.

"You ask me why I mentioned Derek and Meredith. Well, because as I was standing behind you watching your back I remembered a conversation Meredith and I had about her first elevator ride with Derek. Suddenly I felt the same way I imagine Meredith felt back then." Mark raised his eye brows in question. "She wasn't able to resist Derek's charm."

"She kissed him. I know. Derek told me. But what has this to do with us?"

"Easy. I can't resist either."

"Resist what? Throwing me at the wall and kissing me senseless?" Lexie blushed and let her gaze and her hand fall to his chest. "You can imagine that I find this hard to believe. Especially because you told me only two months ago that I should stop. I let you go, Lexie. You walked away."

She could feel his heart pounding under her fingers and spread out her hand to feel how his muscles tensed under her palm. "I know what I said. But yes that's exactly what I wanted to do."

"And now?" Mark put a finger under her chin and lifted her face until their eyes met.

"What now?" Lexie asked innocently.

"Do you still want to kiss me?"

His face was only a few inches away and she could see the desire burning in his steel blue eyes. Lexie couldn't answer. She was beyond words. Talking was overrated sometimes. She knew they had to talk. But now in that moment she only wanted to feel his lips on hers again. Nothing more. She trailed her hands up his chest along his throat and caressed his scruff with her fingers. Her knees almost buckled when she felt his beard under her fingers again. She had missed this feeling. She had missed him so much. She rose on her feet and pressed her lips against his cheek. Mark closed his eyes relishing the feeling of her lips on him.

"Lex?"

When she heard him calling her like that she fell hard. Again. Harder as before. She fell in love with him again. So fast that it made her dizzy and she'd almost torn up when she thought about the time they wasted because of her stubbornness to acknowledge how wonderful the love was they shared and that it was worth fighting for. Then he said it again. Her name. No one else could stir up so many emotions in her only by saying her name.

"Lex, please."

She was lost. She crushed her lips on his pressing her body into him. This kiss was nothing like the one they shared in Joe's bar. She hadn't expected that one. It had been sweet and soft. This one was full of passion. Passion they both bottled up for months. Full of anger and frustration because they wasted so much time. Mark turned her around and smashed her into the wall increasing the pressure of his lips on hers. His tongue stroked hers in a frantic pace and he pushed his hips into her making her groan when she felt his erection against her stomach.

But suddenly Mark stopped and she winced loudly. He stepped back and Lexie opened her eyes slowly. Her whole body was screaming for him. But when she looked at his face she knew immediately that something was wrong and it felt as if he poured a bucket with cold water over her head.

"Mark?" Lexie could see it clearly how he backed away from her emotionally. It was as if he closed a shutter directly in front of her. Shutting her out completely.

Mark took in several deep breaths trying to regain his composure. He had forgotten for several minutes why they broke up. Why Lexie couldn't get away from him fast enough. He had a daughter. With Callie and Lexie didn't want to be a mother. The reasons they broke up where still there. Nothing had changed.

"We can't do this." Mark couldn't look into her eyes. He knew he had to do the right thing but that didn't mean that he didn't almost tear himself into two pieces by pushing her away.

"What?" All the heat that had rushed through Lexie only a few seconds ago drained out of her. It was replaced by a cold that she feared would never leave her again.

"Rushing into this again. I have a daughter now, Lexie. She needs me. I can't risk it."

"Risk what?" Numbness overwhelmed her body. She missed her chance. It was too late.

"My heart. You crushed it twice. I don't think it can survive a third time."

Mark stepped forward switching the button to start the elevator again and slumped into a corner. Lexie stood in front of him. Momentarily speechless. Mark rejected her. She felt sick. She knew she deserved it but that didn't make it any easier. She gulped hard and turned around. Before they reached the fifth floor she spoke, her face still towards the doors.

"The kiss between them certainly didn't end that way."

When the elevator doors opened Lexie almost jumped out of it. Meredith and Derek stood at the nurse station looking both up when they heard Mark shouting after her.

"When I recall it correctly they didn't stop the elevator either."

Lexie unaware of the presence of her sister and brother-in-law hurried down the corridor mumbling to herself when she passed them. "No. They didn't stop the elevator back then." When she almost was around the corner her voice was carried back to them. "Damn. But I should seriously draw a line though."

Derek and Meredith looked stunned at each other before they turned their gazes back to the elevator and saw Mark coming out of it with a frown on his face before he walked away in the opposite direction. They looked from him to the corner Lexie had disappeared around only a few moments ago. It only took them a few seconds to make the right conclusion and when they both turned around to each other they spoke up at the same time.

"Oh no, they didn't just ..."

"I think they did …"

They both stopped in midsentence and chuckled simultaneously. Meredith shook her head in disbelief but Derek was the one who voiced both their thoughts.

"I think they repeated our first encounter in the elevator." A big smile erupted on his face.

"I think so too. Maybe they have still a chance. The elevator surely can have a positive effect on a relationship." Meredith smiled back at her husband remembering all of their elevator moments.

"Two big milestones of our lives definitely happened in there." Derek put his arm around her shoulder and pulled her into an embrace.

"I have to go." Meredith mumbled into his chest.

"Me too. I have to talk to Mark." Derek bent back slightly and looked into her eyes seeing the same determination in them as he was just feeling. They would get to the bottom of this. Mark and Lexie would have to wrap up warmly. He and his wife were on a mission. The mission to help his best friend and her half sister to get back together. If needed with a little push from them in the right direction.

"You'll do that. And I have to talk to Lexie. See you later at home." Meredith looked into the eyes of her husband and knew they were on the same page. Talking some sense into Mark Sloan and Lexie Grey.

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><p><strong>That's it. I would love to hear your thoughts. So please review. <strong>

**I'm not done with this story but I have hardly any free time currently. So it will take a while until I can update this. **

**Thanks to FearTheSpork for beta-reading even though she doesn't watch the show. So all OOCness that might be there is solely my fault. :D **


	2. Sisterly and brotherly suggestions

**I know I haven't updated this in like forever. I'm sorry. But the new spoiler inspired my muse and here is another chapter.**

**Oh and I'm flying solo on this one. No beta-reader. But I read over it a hundred times and I hope I caught most of the errors. So enjoy!**

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><p><strong>Chapter 2: Sisterly and brotherly suggestions<strong>

Derek found Mark exactly where he expected him to be. At the daycare. It really suited him. The whole being a father. He was sitting in a rocking chair, his daughter was laying in the crook of his arm.

His face showed the love for his daughter but when you looked closer you could see the new wrinkles that had appeared around his eyes. Derek debated with himself if he should take a picture. Because apparently it was necessary to prove to Mark that the look he gave his daughter wasn't that much different from the look he gave Lexie when he thought nobody was watching him. Of course the looks towards Lexie were also tinged with sadness and hopelessness but the love was still the dominant part.

Derek opened the door silently and walked into the room stopping only two feet in front of the rocking chair. When Mark looked up at him Derek almost turned around when he saw the hurt and desperation in Mark's eyes. But he'd came here for a reason. He wanted to talk to his best friend and he couldn't back out now.

"How does it feel?" Confusion replaced the hurt in Mark's eyes.

"What do you mean?"

"To be a survivor of a Grey tornado in the elevator." Derek couldn't avoid that a big grin appeared on his face causing Mark to frown back at him before he realized that Derek had seen Lexie and him earlier at the elevator.

"Not funny, Derek. I really don't want to talk about it." As if to undermine his statement Mark turned his gaze back to his daughter while he rocked slightly forth and back. But Derek wouldn't give up that fast.

"They can turn you upside down if they want to. Every time I think I know her Meredith does something that is stunning me completely. I think it's in their genes. They can't help it." Silence felt over the room for almost two minutes and Derek took already a step back towards the door when Mark spoke up.

"But I don't want this." Mark's voice almost broke with the last word.

"Don't want what?" Derek asked in a quiet voice. He could feel that Mark was at the brink of losing his composure but he knew from experience that it was even worse when you were bottling up all your emotions. It was better to get it out of your system before you exploded.

"You know exactly what I mean, Derek. Don't play dumb here." That sounded more like the Mark he knew and Derek continued to dig deeper.

"Mark, the only thing that really matters is if you love her." Mark's gaze was still adverted to his daughter and Derek could barely make out Mark's words when he replied.

"Sometimes love isn't enough." That wasn't exactly an answer to Derek's question so he pressed further.

"You didn't answer my question." Mark's gaze returned to Derek and even though he seemed furious Derek could still see how hurt Mark really was.

"I have Sofia now. I have obligations. I can't live my life as I did for years. You know me forever Derek. I made a lot of mistakes in my life. This time I want to make the right decisions. This is my chance of having a family. Maybe my only chance." Derek took a few seconds to form an appropriate reply to this in his mind.

"You know that I tried to do the right thing too. Sometimes what we think is the right thing isn't right at all."

"You are talking about Addison." It wasn't a question. Of course Mark was there during the whole Addison fiasco. He knew what happened.

"I wanted to save our marriage. But it was already too late. Meredith took my heart. Addison didn't have the slightest chance and I'm still not proud that I put her through all this."

"It still takes two to tango." Derek shook his head slightly. He couldn't understand why Mark could be so sympathetic when it came to the love lives of others but didn't acknowledge how much he was missing Lexie.

"Yeah, I know. But when I saw Meredith with Finn I couldn't lie to myself anymore. She is the love of my life and we wasted too much time. Don't make the same mistake, Mark."

"But she dumped me, Derek. To be more accurate she just left and when I wanted to talk to her she refused to listen to me at all. And don't get me started on the whole Avery debacle." Mark's voice got a desperate tinge.

"You both made mistakes. A lot of mistakes. Your relationship was rocky since Sloane appeared in your life but I still believe that you can make it work." Derek tried to get through to Mark but wasn't sure if there was any chance that Mark would see the truth in his words.

"What if I don't want to make it work?" Derek started to get angry by hearing those words from Mark. He would love to hit him with a bat over the head right now.

"Maybe you can fool yourself, Mark. But everyone can see that you still want her. Every time you lay eyes on her it's all over your face."

"I don't want this, Derek." Mark repeated the same sentence from just a few minutes ago. Maybe if he repeated it often enough it would become true somehow. As if Derek could read his mind he replied.

"Believe me, it doesn't go away only because you want it to. And I'm speaking of experience here. Loving a Grey isn't easy but it's worth all the effort and heartache."

"Really?" Mark's voice started to sound unsure. Maybe Derek was after all able to get through his defenses.

"Really! Give her another chance. If I'm interpreting it correctly she kissed you in the elevator?"

"Yeah, she kissed me."

"Answer me one question, Mark." Derek took in a deep breath and asked the same question he had asked a few minutes earlier. "Are you in love with Lexie?"

"Don't ask me that, Derek." Mark tried to avoid the question but Derek had gone too far to let him crawl back behind the shield Mark apparently had build around his heart.

"Are you?"

"Of course I am. I almost lost it in the elevator. But it can't happen again. It hurts too much and I'm tired of picking up the pieces of my heart after she breaks it over and over again." While the first sentences were spoken in rage the last sentence only sounded sad and Mark's gaze dropped back to his daughter in his arms.

"At least think about it. I'm still pretty certain that she is the love of your life. And you and I don't want to admit it but we aren't getting any younger. We have no time left to waste." Derek waited until Mark nodded slightly to give him the confirmation that he would indeed think about it before he turned around and left Mark with his daughter behind to mull over the things he just told him.

~M&L~

Meredith's first guess was the vending machines on the third floor. When she rounded the corner she could see Lexie slipping into a supply closet. An unwrapped candy bar already in her hand. After all Lexie was a stress eater. Meredith followed her and pushed the door to the supply closet open startling Lexie and she dropped the half eaten candy bar on the floor when she swirled around to see who disturbed her need to be alone.

"God, Meredith. You scared the crap out of me."

Meredith leaned with one shoulder at the now closed door and looked at Lexie with a glint in her eyes that made Lexie somehow uncomfortable. Lexie knew that look. Meredith was definitely up to something. Lexie took another candy bar out of her pocket and as soon as she had removed the paper she bit down a huge chunk. Before she could gulp it down and ask Meredith why she pursued her into the supply closet Meredith already answered her unspoken question.

"Should I get you a marker." Lexie frowned at her sister who had a big smile on her face.

"What?"

"To draw the line." It took Lexie a few seconds before the realization hit her.

"You were there."

"Yeah, me and Derek." Lexie took another bite of the candy bar and mumbled with a full mouth.

"Oh my god, can this get any more embarrassing?"

"What happened?" Meredith asked her eager to hear what happened exactly in the elevator.

"I throw myself at him like I'm a horny teenager." This answer and the expression on Lexie's face caused Meredith to laugh out loud.

"It's not funny." Lexie's voice started to sound angry.

"Actually it is. That's exactly how I felt when I kissed Derek in the elevator." Meredith still chuckled when she saw the embarrassment on Lexie's face.

"I wish you wouldn't have told me about this. It's all your fault, you know?" Lexie pointed an accusatory finger at her sister.

"What? Why?" Meredith chuckles subsided immediately when she heard this accusation.

"I remembered our conversation and then he smirked at me and I was lost." Meredith tried to suppress the laughter that bubbled up in her again. Lexie seemed really upset.

"Lexie, you are seriously screwed." Lexie looked up at her sister and nodded slightly.

"I know. Wait, why am I screwed?"

"It's so obvious. You are in love with McSteamy and sleeping around with other people and having meaningless relationships to forget him don't make this love go away. Believe me, it doesn't work."

"At least I tried." Lexie replied with a quivering voice and turned around to hide her face from Meredith.

"Lexie, you are really a Grey! We are always pushing away what's best for us."

"He doesn't want me back, Meredith. I've lost him." Meredith could see Lexie tearing up and she felt sorry for her sister that she pushed the love of her life away and maybe lost her chance to win him back.

"Do you love him?" Meredith asked her seriously. The laughter was gone because she could clearly see how much her sister hurt.

"Yes, I love him but what makes the situation even worse is that I'm also in love with him." When Lexie looked up again Meredith could see a tear running down her cheek.

"Lexie, you are a _Grey_!"

"And what exactly does that suppose to mean?" Lexie asked angrily and wiped away the tear.

"Go get him. We can be stubborn as hell. Don't tell me you don't have more up your sleeve to convince Mark that he should give your relationship another chance."

A small smile appeared on Lexie's face and replaced the lines of worry around her eyes.

"See, you have already an idea." Meredith smiled at her sister.

"Yes, but we have to see if it is any good."

Meredith could still see the tears shimmering in Lexie's eyes but she also recognized the stubborn look in them. Lexie was on a mission. Winning back the love of her life and judging from the look she wasn't afraid to play a little dirty.

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><p><strong>I promise I will try to update a lot faster from now on. I hope you liked it. See you soon.<strong>


	3. The failed plan

**Chapter 3: The failed plan**

Mark stood at his kitchen counter stirring the spaghetti sauce while his mind was occupied with thoughts about Lexie. Since Derek spoke to him earlier at the daycare he couldn't get her out of his mind. Not that she hadn't been on his mind before this talk. Now that he had time to think about it the kiss in the elevator was even more surprising than it was when it actually happened. Especially the fact that even being apart for almost a year hadn't changed anything. The fire was still there and when he didn't pay attention it could burn him to ashes. At least his heart could be burnt to ashes.

Shutting down the stove Mark's thoughts went back to the last evening Lexie had been in his apartment. The things she said still clear in his mind.

"_I'm putting in some tarragon. Not that I have any idea what tarragon tastes like. But I think when people use tarragon it makes them seem like they know what they are doing."_

She had been so happy because they were a couple again and she could make him dinner whenever she wanted. Chatting away in her usual rambling mode until he dropped the bomb onto her. And he had to admit it, he should have found another way to tell her. Maybe he should have approached the subject more smoothly. But he knew beforehand that she would leave him after hearing his news and he was right.

"_How the hell did you get me in this position? Twice."_

But he hadn't expected that she wouldn't talk to him at all. If somebody would have told him that she would have had a new boyfriend this soon afterwards he would have totally called him a fool. But she had moved on very quickly and that was still hurting like hell. Though it didn't change the fact that he was still deeply in love with her. That he would never love anyone more than he loved her. Now the only question was if he would act on his feelings or if he was too scared to get hurt again.

Standing in the elevator Lexie looked into her small make-up mirror. She wanted to look as good as possible. It was actually a big part of her plan. Dazzling him with her appearance. Closing the mirror she left the elevator on Mark's floor and walked towards his apartment. Stopping in front of the door she took in a deep breath.

"Now or never." Lexie told herself. She raised her hand and knocked on his door.

Hearing the knock Mark moved the jar completely away from the stove and walked to the door. Curious who wanted to see him now. He hoped nothing was wrong with Sofia. But he hadn't anticipated the person who stood outside of his apartment when he opened the door.

"Hey, Mark. Can I come in?"

Without thinking he closed the door into her face. He couldn't deal with her right now. Not when his emotions were crashing down on him. He let his head rest on the door. Who was he kidding? He couldn't let her walk away like this.

Lexie stood shocked in front of the door. He had shut her out. He didn't even want to talk to her. Tears sprang into her eyes but she refused to let them fall. Maybe it was just bad timing. She would try it another time. She turned around and walked slowly towards the elevator when she heard the door open again and Mark calling after her.

"Lex?"

For a few seconds Lexie toyed with the idea to just ignore him but she couldn't. Seeing him standing in the door frame made her even more aware how much she had missed him. As strange as this might sound. Locking her eyes with his she returned to the door and stepped into his apartment without waiting for an invitation. Just a minute ago she almost cried but now fury washed over her. She'd had a plan and he ruined it. Hearing the sound of the door closing behind her she swirled around and started to speak without giving Mark a chance to say anything.

"Shutting the door into my face like that? Seriously? What's wrong with you? Don't you think this is a little immature? I had a whole speech prepared. I knew exactly what I wanted to say and now you've ruined everything. I even wanted to throw in some teach me's. For god's sake! I'm even wearing the same clothes." Lexie approached him and punched him in the chest. "Not that you realized that. As if men would ever remember such unimportant things like clothing."

It took Mark a few seconds to recover from this unexpected verbal assault but Lexie was wrong. He remembered exactly what she had worn the day she came to his hotel room and he asked himself immediately if she was wearing the same bra and panties as well. She looked amazing in her fury but he couldn't remember the last time he had seen her that furious and he involuntarily took a step back.

"I put a lot of effort into this and then you went all sorehead on me." Following him Lexie shouted at him and pushed a finger repeatedly into his chest until Mark's retreat was suddenly stopped when his back hit the fridge. Standing up on her tiptoes Lexie raised her face until she was only a few inches away from his.

"I have no idea why I put up with this."

Suddenly she realized how close together they were standing and her gaze dropped involuntarily to Mark's lips before she looked up into his eyes again. No one spoke a word while they both stood stock still searching in each others eyes for an answer to the question what they should do next.

"To hell with being mature." Mark growled deep in his throat as he crushed his lips onto hers and Lexie melted into his body instantly. It was not how she imagined her plan would unfold but the result was the same. She sighed under his lips and reciprocated his kiss with such a passion that Mark's head smacked into the fridge.

His fingers dug deep into her ass and when he lifted her up she wrapped her legs immediately around his hips. Without interrupting the kiss Mark walked forward until they hit the kitchen counter. He lowered Lexie onto it and with one swift move of his arm he threw everything on it to the floor while his lips were still locked with hers. Wrapping her hands around Mark's neck Lexie leaned back on the counter and took him with her. Not wanting to lose the body contact Mark almost climbed onto the kitchen counter with her. Settling on the more comfortable possibility he balanced himself on one foot and pressed his body into hers while he kissed her desperately.

After several minutes Mark released her lips and began to trail kisses along her neck. Lexie had missed the feeling of his scruff on her skin. How could she ever think that someone else would be able to make her feel the way Mark did every time he touched her? She groaned loudly when Mark bit carefully into the sensitive flesh directly over her collarbone. But before she could relish the feeling he licked with his tongue over the same spot and she tightened her legs around him to pull him even further into her.

But suddenly Mark buried his face into her neck and stopped every movement. Lexie could hear and feel him panting against her skin and was at a loss what made him stop.

When Mark raised his head and looked into her eyes she wanted to scream. He had the same look on his face as in the elevator. She couldn't believe that he was still able to act reasonable in any way. She lost that ability the second she stepped over his threshold.

"What are we doing?" Mark asked her breathlessly.

"Making out on your kitchen counter?" Lexie replied innocently.

"This is so wrong."

"Not at all. It feels pretty amazing." Lexie arched her back so that she came in contact with his erection again but Mark pulled away from her and pushed her legs down.

"Stop it, Lexie. I can't think straight when you are near me. Never could. Never will. But I need to act rationally. For once in my life. Let me time to think about this and then we need to talk first before we jump into bed again. Do you remember the last time we acted immediately on our impulses? Not that it wasn't great. Oh my god it was amazing like it always is with you."

"You think so?" Lexie propped herself up on her elbows and looked at Mark in his disheveled state. Seeing his hair all messed up by her hands caused a tug deep in her and desire flooded over her. She wanted this man so much that it physically hurt. But Mark backed up completely and avoided any contact between them. Reluctantly Lexie stood up from the counter and straightened her clothes. Meeting her eyes Mark answered quietly.

"You know exactly how good we are between the sheets. You can't say the same about our talking skills. We always bail. We never try to make it work. Not that I haven't tried to talk to you. But you didn't want to listen to me."

"I know."

"And I still think that you should have given me ... Wait a sec. You agree?" Unconsciously Mark had taken a step towards her again so that Lexie could touch him if she would move her fingers only a few inches.

"Yes, Mark. I agree. We should have talked about it. But I was so hurt that you have another child with someone else than me." Realizing what she just spilled out Lexie shoved him away and rushed to the door. "I'll go now and leave you to the thinking. We'll talk soon."

Mark looked dumbfounded at the closed door. Did he just hear right? If he wasn't mistaken she just admitted that she wanted a child. With him. Maybe not immediately but alone the fact that she was thinking about having a family with him at some point in her life made him happy. Maybe they had still a chance. Maybe he should give this one more try.

"Why did I tell him that? Of all things." Lexie mumbled to herself as she stomped towards the elevator. Reaching it she punched the call button repeatedly as if the button was to blame for her current predicament. "I think that was the stupidest thing I've ever done in my life. I wanted to seduce him and not spill my guts out. Well, not now anyway. Of course I wanted to talk to him not only jumping him."

When the elevator arrived Lexie went into it and pressed the button to the ground floor. As the doors closed in front of her she clasped her hands over her face. "And now I'm talking with myself. I'm a mess. And it's all his fault." As she lowered her hands she promised herself that this wasn't the end. "But I'm not finished with him yet. Let's see how long it takes until I break him. I can do it. I know I can. He can't avoid me in the hospital."

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><p><strong>Okay, that's it. For now. Thank you all for reading. I hope you enjoyed it. I already started to write the next chapter. :D<strong>


	4. The on call room

**It took me longer than I expected. I got a little carried away. But I don't think you will mind. So here you go. Enjoy!**

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><p><strong>Chapter 4: The on call room<strong>

"What are you looking at?" Meredith asked Lexie who leaned against the corner staring intently in the direction of the nurse station. But as if she didn't hear her at all Lexie didn't break eye contact with whomever she was holding it. Meredith couldn't see the person Lexie had the staring contest with but was really curious when a smirk suddenly appeared on Lexie's face. "Woww. Do you want to set something on fire? Because if you do I bet you are getting really close with that look."

Meredith stood now directly beside Lexie and followed her gaze. She wasn't really surprised when she saw who the recipient of Lexie's stare was.

"Okay, I admit it. He is definitely worth to be set on fire. Especially the clothes. I wonder how he looks like naked. Not that I ever had the chance to experience it myself." Meredith stated provocatively.

"What?" Lexie asked confused her gaze still glued to Mark.

"I thought that would get your attention." Breaking the eye contact with him Lexie turned around to her sister furrowing her brows in anger.

"What are you talking about? You will never see him naked!"

"Hello! Earth to Lexie. In which universe are you currently? It's me. Meredith. Your sister. Happily married to Derek. Jeez. I didn't know that you are so touchy."

"Sorry." Lexie apologized quickly before she saw the smile that broke out on Meredith's face. "Ahhh, you are messing with me."

"Sure. Because you are so easy and it's just too much fun."

"Only when it comes to him." Lexie's eyes returned to Mark who was still standing at the nurse station now deeply in conversation with Derek.

"Right. So how is it going anyway?" Meredith asked curiously.

"Hmmm, let me think. We had a wild make out session on his kitchen counter before he backed away again." Lexie stated nonchalantly as if this happened every day.

"Seriously?"

"Yes. Could you imagine that? McSteamy got all reasonable on me." Lexie threw up her arms in frustration.

"Well, not really a surprise." Meredith replied calmly.

"What? You are supposed to back me up here. You know, because of the whole _being my_ _sister_ thing."

"Of course I'm on your side. But I think if he wouldn't care about you he would have slept with you. No doubt."

"Yeah, maybe you are right." Lexie replied slightly defeated.

"And what does that tell you?" Meredith asked her with a voice that sounded a lot like Lexie's teacher from elementary school.

"That he cares about me?"

"Okay that too. Mark loves you, Lexie. He loved you even through the whole Jackson debacle. So can you two please get over the whole awkward in-between stage and settle down already?"

"You think we would make it."

"Definitely." Meredith let her gaze return to the nurse station. "Oh and he is still watching you."

"Really?" Lexie asked with a satisfactory smile on her face.

"Yes. Come on, Lexie. Play a little with him. You know, a meaningful look over your shoulder and then drop an unmistakable hint that he should follow you to an on call room. I'm married. I need some steam here." Meredith said with a feigned pleading voice.

"Okay then. Steam it is." Lexie straightened her lab coat and with a last look towards Meredith who gave her a thumbs up she took in a deep breath and walked over to Mark and Derek.

~M&L~

When Derek walked down the stairs to the nurse station he spotted Mark standing there with a patient chart forgotten in his hand staring in the other direction. Following his gaze he saw Meredith and Lexie a few feet away chatting vividly. He joined his friend at the nurse station and dropped his own chart on the desk with a loud thud in the attempt to startle Mark but it seemed that he didn't even realize that someone was standing right next to him. But he was proved wrong when Mark suddenly spoke.

"What do you think they are talking about?" Mark asked Derek without looking at him.

"I know you think women are some mysterious beings and most of the time we are trying to figure out what they are thinking. But in this case I'm almost one hundred percent certain they are talking about you." Derek stated after watching his wife and her sister intently for several seconds.

"Me?" Mark turned his head around to Derek in surprise.

"Yes. And judging by the looks they are throwing in our direction you're screwed."

"Why?" Mark was totally confused right now.

"If I've ever seen a 'I imagine you naked` look then this look definitely falls under this category. I'm sure they are cooking up some plan to kill you." Derek enjoyed watching the confusion on his best friend's face for a few moments longer before he clarified his statement. "Figuratively speaking."

Still Mark didn't seem to understand what he was trying to tell him and Derek took the more direct approach.

"Do you have some condoms handy?" Derek was able to ask Mark with a still straight face even though it took him some effort to suppress his laughter.

"What?" Derek had almost pity with Mark when he saw how hard Mark was trying to figure out what he was talking about. But he had definitely too much fun messing with him.

"Never mind. I think you don't need one with Lexie anyway?"

"Why do you think I need a condom?" Having mercy with him after all Derek answered his question in an unmistakable way.

"Mark, I'll bet twenty bucks that you will follow her within the next ten minutes and you two won't end up only talking to each other."

"Do you think?" Mark queried with a little bit of understanding now in his voice.

"Absolutely." Derek said.

"Can I prevent it?" Mark asked curiously.

"No chance."

"I guess I have to live with it then." Mark mocked defeat.

"Don't hurt yourself." Derek replied with a big smile while he clapped him on the shoulder. Looking at Mark's face he saw that he grinned from ear to ear and Derek shook his head in disbelief.

"You are already imagining it."

"Yeah!" Mark answered dreamily.

"Is it good?" Derek couldn't hold back the question.

"Definitely!" Mark assured him. "I'm feeling already hot only thinking about it."

"Here it comes." Derek whispered to Mark when he saw Lexie coming into their direction.

"Dr. Sloan!" Lexie deliberately ignored Derek but he wasn't the slightest affronted. Her eyes were fixated on Mark.

"Dr. Grey!" Mark replied in a husky voice and Derek looked down quickly to hide the grin that appeared on his face. Lexie walked by them swaying her hips in a provocative manner and only seconds later she turned her head around and looked one more time back to Mark while licking her lips suggestively. Derek chuckled slightly beside Mark when he saw it. No subtlety there. But when he looked at Mark his friend didn't move a muscle except of the one in his face that indicated that he clenched his teeth. Derek really admired Mark for his strength but enough was enough.

"What are you waiting for? Do you need a blinking neon sign? She wants you. You want her. Stop torturing yourself." Derek said exasperatedly.

"Go." Derek pushed him in the direction Lexie just disappeared.

"But ..."

"You can talk afterwards. As long as you two haven't blown off some steam there will be no talking anyway. Stop thinking so hard for a few minutes and have some fun."

~M&L~

Mark rounded the corner just in time to see Lexie slipping into an on call room leaving the door slightly ajar. The moment he stepped through the door Lexie's hand shot forward and grabbed him by the collar of his lab coat pulling him into the room while she closed the door with her other hand slamming him into it.

"Will you make a new habit of this? Slamming me into hard surfaces?" Mark smiled down at her while he fumbled behind him for the lock of the door.

"Shut up." Lexie tightened her fist even further so that his lab coat was pressed uncomfortably into his throat. "Just to be clear on the matter. Now that you are here there is no backing away again. Got that?"

"Loud and clear. Wouldn't dream of it." Mark finally found the lock and turned it around. They didn't need any interruptions.

"Good."

Lexie released his lab coat from her grip and took two steps back slightly embarrassed by her own actions. She really needed to release some pressure. She felt as if she could explode any second. Taking in some deep breaths she turned around and faced the window trying to calm herself down a little while she decided how she wanted to proceed. She didn't want to jump him. She waited far too long to have him again. She wanted it to be slow. Wanted to enjoy every single second of it when they would be finally connected again. Physically and emotionally.

"Lex? Something wrong?" Mark's voice directly beside her ear startled her but before she could turn around he wrapped his arms around her and buried his face in her hair. "You aren't nervous, aren't you?"

"No. Not nervous. Just a little … I don't know … anxious maybe? "

"Let me help you with that." Mark whispered into her ear brushing her hair behind it before he lowered his head and trailed butterfly kisses along her jaw. Lexie relaxed immediately in his arms and tilted her head to give him better access to her neck. Accepting her offer Mark followed the line of her neck with his lips nibbling carefully at her skin on his way down to her collar bone.

Lexie tightened her grip around his arms that were still resting on her stomach when his scruff scraped over her skin and a sigh escaped her lips. Hardly making any contact Mark kissed his way back to her ear taking her ear lobe into his mouth biting down on it carefully causing Lexie to let out another moan.

"You smell so good and I love to taste you." His hoarse voice floated to her ear. Her knees already went weak under her when he turned her around and cupped her cheek in his hand caressing it with his thumb. Slowly he bent down and stopped only a few inches before her mouth. Mark waited until Lexie opened her eyes again and they stood still for a few seconds feeling each others breath on their lips. Lexie shuddered in his arms and Mark closed the last gap between them capturing her lips with his.

The kiss was a repeat performance of the kiss in Joe's bar. Slow and sultry without any tongue contact at first and like in Joe's bar Lexie grabbed his upper arms to held herself steady. When he slipped his tongue into her mouth she wrapped her hands around his neck and pulled him further into her while they were still kissing in an agonizingly slow pace.

Without parting their lips they removed their lab coats. Mark began to untie her scrub pants and with a shake of her hips they felt on the ground. Lifting her up Mark carried her towards the bed and lay her carefully down on it. They interrupted their kiss only for the brief moment it took them to pull their shirts over their heads before Mark lowered his body onto hers.

When they had to come up for air Mark's eyes bored into hers and the desire Lexie saw in them took her breath away. She was so in love with him that she didn't know how she could convince herself to leave him and never come back. Tears sprang into her eyes and her feelings got the better of her when she felt his back muscles under her fingers.

"Don't cry, Lexie." Mark brushed the lonely tear Lexie couldn't hold back tentatively away.

"It's just … I'm just a little overwhelmed right now. Nothing to worry about." Pulling his head down to her she whispered barely audible. "Make love to me."

~M&L~

Entangled in each others embrace they lay exhausted on the bed. The steam was definitely blown off for the moment.

"I missed that." Lexie murmured sleepily.

"What? The sex?" Mark chuckled into her hair.

"Yeah, that too. But I missed all of you. Not only the sex. Talking to you about everything and nothing. Though I have to admit I really missed your body. You did take good care of it while I was gone." Lexie stroked admiringly over the muscles of his torso.

"Wouldn't want to let it go to waste only because you decided to walk away from it." Mark let his hand trail up and down her spine and silence fell over them for a few minutes before Mark broke it. "Okay, now that we got it out of our system, can we talk about some things?"

"I think we should." Lexie replied quietly.

"At first I have one question. I know I shouldn't ask it but I want to know."

"What is it?"

"Why Jackson and why so fast?" Mark blurted the question out before he could change his mind.

"Not exactly a good "after sex" topic. Talking about the ex." Lexie tried to prolong the inevitable.

"Will you answer it nonetheless?" Hearing the uncertainty in his voice made her heart clench.

"Yes, I will." Lexie paused briefly before she continued. "He was there when you weren't."

"But I ..."

"I know that it was my fault and not yours." Lexie interrupted him. "But I couldn't talk to you because I was so mad at you and then the whole thing with my father and his _girlfriend_ happened and I needed desperately someone to talk to. Meredith didn't understand why I found the whole situation so inappropriate."

"Okay and what happened exactly that day?" Mark furrowed his brows when he thought back to that day. It was the day he sent Jackson to check on Lexie giving him the advice to take some peanut butter cups with him. But Jackson told him that Lexie didn't say anything. He got suspicious that Jackson played them both but waited until Lexie would confirm it.

"I was angry. At everyone. At my father. At his _girlfriend._ At Meredith and most of all at you. I was going crazy with all the pent up anger and Jackson came along and talked to me. I could tell him how much I missed you and everything else. He let me vent and when he was on the parking lot later I was just so tired. I was hurt and I needed someone or something. So I took him home with me." Lexie's voice was barely audible at the end. She was slightly ashamed to admit to Mark that she took the first one that came along the way into bed with her.

"Bastard! He took totally advantage of the situation. I'm going to kill him." Mark shouted out furiously.

"What?" Lexie asked totally taken aback by the anger she could hear in Mark's voice and looked quizzically up in Mark's face.

"I was the one who wanted to know how you were doing. You wouldn't talk to me so I sent Jackson to see if you would talk to him. I knew that you were angry and that you needed someone to talk to. I couldn't be the one so I thought it would be a great idea to let you talk to someone who is already a friend. Apparently not one of my brightest ideas." Mark stated with a slight shrug of his shoulder.

"That's unbelievable." Mark flinched visibly fairly certain that he was angry with him because he wanted to check up on her. But he was surprised when Lexie stroke out on Jackson and not on him. "He totally talked me out of going to you. Twice. I was talking about soul mates with him and he told me that the whole _there is only one true soul mate out there_ would be total bullshit. Bastard."

"You think we are soul mates?" Mark couldn't believe what he just heard.

"I don't know how you feel but without you I'm not whole. You are my second half, Mark. The one who makes me complete." Mark couldn't answer her because he had a big lump in his throat. The only thing he could manage to get around without losing it completely were only three words.

"I love you."

"I love you too, Mark."

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><p><strong>To be honest when I first wrote the chapter it was definitely M-worthy. Because let's face it I'm a sucker for smut. But I started this story as a T and I decided to finish it as a T. Though if anyone is interested in the M-version of this chapter just let me know. I will put it up separately then. <strong>

**So now I can only wish you all a great premier day on Thursday. Hopefully with some M/L scenes. See you soon.**


	5. The attic

**I loved Mark's scenes in the premiere. They inspired me to write this chapter. I'm sure you know what scene exactly when you read it. So if anyone of you actually likes Jackson … you might wanna skip the scene. :D **

**Okay, let's just assume for my story that Lexie is still living in Meredith's attic. Oh and the M-version of this chapter is already up. So you can decide which version you want to read. Enjoy!**

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><p><strong>Chapter 5: The attic<strong>

"Then I'll see you later. Hopefully." Mark stood in front of Lexie brushing a strand of hair behind her ear.

"I hope so too. But it's a crazy day." Lexie replied.

"I know." Mark gave her a quick peck on the lips but when Lexie opened her lips he couldn't resist to deepen the kiss. Only the fact that they were standing in the middle of the hospital prevented him from kissing her more hungrily. "I have to go before I'm not able to leave you."

"I wouldn't complain. You know, there is an on call room right around the corner." Lexie smirked mischievously.

"Very tempting. But I have surgery in twenty minutes and that's definitely not enough time." Mark sighed clearly disappointed wrapping his arms around her.

"Are you sure? It's enough time for a quickie against the wall." Lexie deadpanned.

"You are evil!" Mark growled.

"Does it work?" Lexie smiled up at him.

"No." Mark let her out of his arms and stepped away one step. "As much as I really want to right now, it's not gonna happen." Taking a step towards her again he whispered into her ear. "I want to make you squirm and that needs definitely some time."

"That sounds interesting. I will certainly take you up on this promise." Lexie stated.

"It will be my pleasure."

Mark turned around and walked away but Lexie remained in the exact same spot following Mark with her eyes until he rounded the corner.

"I see you jumped your ex right away." Hearing Jackson's voice behind her sputtering out this venom sparked her anger. She was already cranky because she hadn't seen Mark much the last days due to both of their crazy work schedules and that was just the last straw.

"Jackson, shut up." Lexie swirled around facing her ex.

"What? You know that's seriously pathetic! Do you really need it that much that you can't live without sex for a few days?" Jackson mocked.

"You have absolutely no right to talk to me like that. You know nothing about me. Do you hear me? Nothing. You were always the rebound guy. I never loved you." Lexie spat out.

"So you went back to the man who impregnates every woman that comes along?" Jackson asked angrily.

"You are in no position to judge him." Lexie inhaled a deep breath trying to stay fairly calm but failed. "And you are one to talk. Mark told me that he sent you to talk to me and gave you the suggestion to take peanut butter cups with you."

"Yeah. Strange, right?"

"Strange?" Lexie huffed furiously. "You can be glad that I don't have the strength to really hurt you. Because believe me if I could I would beat you to a weeping pulp right now. But wait I can ask Mark to do it. I'm sure he would love to do me the favor. Do you know that he fought with Derek because of me? You would stand no chance. So get out of my way. I don't want to talk to you. You took advantage of me when I was the most vulnerable and what makes me really angry is that I let you. You know what? You are right. I am pathetic. It's pathetic that I ever slept with you. You are nothing compared to him. Do you hear me? Nothing." Lexie stormed away leaving a totally baffled Jackson behind.

~M&L~

Returning from an emergency call at three a.m. in the morning Derek found Mark on their doorstep.

"What are you doing here?" Derek asked him curiously.

"I …. I don't know." Mark rubbed his hands tiredly over his face.

"It's three o'clock in the morning!" Derek stated.

"I know." Mark answered quietly.

"You are very talkative." Derek stated sarcastically but Mark remained silent. "Is there the slightest chance that I will get a response that actually makes any sense?"

"I don't think so." Mark fixed his gaze on a bush behind Derek.

"You know that you are way beyond any help." Derek joked.

"I know."

"Are you aware that you are acting totally sappy?" Derek looked down at Mark amused by the state his best friend was in right now.

"Maybe."

"Come on. I'm sure Lexie doesn't mind when you crawl into bed with her." Derek put one hand under Mark's shoulder to pull him up.

"Not sure about that." Mark replied but stood up and followed Derek into the house.

Going upstairs he stopped shortly in front of Lexie's room before he carefully opened the door and slipped inside. Moonlight was streaming through the curtains illuminating Lexie's body under the sheets. Mark took of all his clothes except of his boxers and lifted the blanket climbing into bed with her. For several minutes he was just content to watch her face until he couldn't resist anymore and trailed a finger along her hairline down her cheek to her lips. Lexie awoke with a start staring confused up to him.

"I'm sorry that I woke you up." Mark whispered.

"Mark? What are you doing here?" Lexie asked still half asleep.

"I've missed you."

"I've missed you, too." Lexie snuggled into his embrace and inhaled deeply. It was just something about Mark's scent. Something soothing. Something comforting. She never felt more safe as when she was in his arms.

"I mean not just today. I still can't believe that I can touch you again. Every time I want to. I thought that I've lost you forever, Lexie. That I will never be able to hold you in my arms again. It ..." Mark gulped hard before he was able to continue. Losing her was still too fresh in his mind. "It was hard, Lexie. Really hard. I love you. You know that."

Lexie nodded unable to say anything around the big lump in her throat. She loved him so much and still she hurt him so much either.

"You are the love of my life. I can exist without you but I can't live without you. Without you my life is just a meaningless series of days. Lexie, I ..." When Mark didn't continue Lexie raised her head and looked up into his face.

"What?"

"I'm sorry. For everything." Lexie needed all her strength to restrain herself from asking but she felt that Mark had to get it out without any interruption from her side. So she only took his hand into hers and intertwined their fingers. "Sleeping with Addison. Sleeping with Callie. I shouldn't have done it but it happened and I can't change it anymore. I just want you to know that I'm well aware how much I hurt you. I knew the minute Callie told me that she is pregnant that I would lose you. That you would never be able to love me and stay with me after hearing it. But a small part of me still hoped that you would at least give it a try. But you left. That was what hurt the most, Lex. That you could just walk away from us without looking back. You just told me that you love me. Was I not worth fighting for?"

During his whole speech Mark looked up to the ceiling not able to tell Lexie all of it if he had watched her face. When he now looked at her he was shocked to see the tears that was streaming silently down her cheeks.

"I'm so sorry, Mark. I love you. More than you can imagine. I'm in love with you. I put you through hell. I'm sorry. Sorry for sleeping with Alex. Sorry for sleeping with Jackson. Just so you know. I never loved them. I just needed them. I felt so lonely without you. But you never asked my opinion. Not with Sloan not with Callie's pregnancy. We were supposed to be in a relationship. It seemed that it didn't matter what I was feeling what I had to say about it. That's not how relationships work, Mark."

"I know. I have to believe that we can make it work this time, Lexie. Apparently we can't live without each other so we need to talk about our problems in the future. No unilateral decisions from now on. No running away." Mark brushed tenderly the tears away pulling her down to kiss her softly. Releasing her he caressed her cheek and asked quietly. "Okay?"

"Okay. But there is still something I need to know." Lexie turned her face and kissed his palm briefly before she lay her intertwined hands on his chest.

"Shoot."

"Why are you still here? Why did you take me back? I expected that you would move on. Why didn't you?"

"Easy to answer. Because I love you, Alexandra Grey. I think I already fell in love with you when you stood in my hotel room and took of your clothes. Asking me to teach you. Did you have any idea how hard I tried to not think about you? I fought against my feelings for weeks before that. You were always on my mind."

"Really?" Lexie smiled shakily.

"Really! And then you were standing right in front of me asking me if you are that bad. Seriously, Lexie? You waltzed into my room and took off all your clothes begging me to take you. How could I resist?"

"I didn't beg you."

"No, of course not. No begging involved. Are you kidding? It was exactly like that. I would want to say that you didn't know better but you did. You knew exactly what effect you would have on me. After all I'm a man."

Lexie smirked mischievously .

"Did you really think I hadn't planned to seduce you that night? There was this gossip around the hospital about you and your abilities in bed. And well, I was curious. I wanted to see if there was any truth behind the rumors."

"And I showed you the truth." Mark stated smugly.

"Oh yeah! Over and over again." Lexie sighed.

"Should I show you again?"

"Yes, I would very much appreciate it." Lexie murmured.

Lexie shrieked in surprise when Mark rolled them both around so that she was trapped under his body.

"I remember I promised you squirming this morning." Mark whispered hoarsely.

"I didn't forget it."

"So, … are you ready?"

"Can't wait."

"Then let's get started."


	6. The right moment

**I think I have to warn you beforehand. I'm an angst fan. A big, big angst fan. I never intended to take the story in this direction but my muse decided that we should take that road and believe me you can't argue with her. I always have to go with the flow. :D **

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><p><strong>Chapter 6: The right moment<strong>

He bought it the day after he had kissed her in Joe's bar. He thought they finally were able to leave everything behind them. To start over. He was wrong. His own slip with Callie destroyed everything. She was gone the second he told her about the baby and the year after that was hell. There was no other word to describe it. Of course he was happy with Sofia. How could he not be? She was after all his daughter but he never was completely happy. Not without Lexie.

Mark turned the ring between his fingers. Watching the light sparkling in the diamond. Should he buy a new one? After all it symbolized everything they were trying to forget. But he bought it in a moment of true happiness. He even got it engraved. Convincing the engraver to do it the same day. It had cost a fortune but he didn't care.

_YATOWPMBT_

Nine letters. These nine words meant a lot to him when he had said them to her after he stopped another of her ramblings. She was so beautiful that day. So unsure if he wanted to continue the relationship. He got into a fight with Derek because of her. And she was telling him something about their surviving rate. He didn't know where it came from but suddenly the words were out.

_You are the one who put me back together. _

Standing in the jewelry store he remembered these words and thought they would be perfect for the engagement ring. But he never could ask her. Never got the chance. Now that they were together again the ring was burning a hole in his pocket. His feelings didn't change since that day. But was Lexie ready to take the next step? Or would he scare her away again if he would ask her to marry him?

His brooding was interrupted by a knock on his office door and without waiting for his answer Derek walked in. Stopping immediately when he saw the ring in Mark's hand.

"You are going to propose?" Derek asked without preamble. He knew that Mark wanted nothing more than to marry Lexie. So he wasn't surprised that he bought an engagement ring for her.

"I was going to propose." Mark's gaze returned to the ring. "A year ago."

It took Derek a few seconds before he realized what Mark was referring to. So Mark had hold onto the ring over a year. Derek never knew that Mark bought an engagement ring after Lexie and he got together for this short period last year. Not sure what to say he took a few steps forward closing the door behind him and stretched out his hand. "Can I see it?"

Mark handed the ring over to Derek. It was beautiful. Beautiful in its simplicity. He would bet that it was platinum. Mark would never buy something less for Lexie. And the one diamond was just perfect. Derek was sure Lexie would love the ring. But one look into Mark's face made it clear that there was the possibility that Lexie would never see the ring.

"And now? Are you going to ask her?" Derek asked cautiously.

"I don't know, Derek." Mark replied after a few seconds of silence. "I'm not sure what her answer will be. I don't want to screw it up this time."

"I understand. But you never looked happier than this last month. Both of you."

"I am happy. We are happy. But I know that Lexie has big plans regarding her surgical career and that talking about marriage now might be too soon for her."

"What do _you_ want, Mark?"

"I?" Mark stared blankly out of the window before he turned his gaze back to Derek. "I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I want to grow old with her. Want to have a family with her." Restlessly Mark got up from his chair and walked from one end of the room to the other. "I want everything. As long as she is with me. Nothing else matters. So if I'm honest with myself then ... Yes, I want to marry her. I want to have kids with her. But if she doesn't want these things I would give it up for her. I would give up almost everything for her."

"You are in love with her." Derek stated.

"So much that it hurts sometimes to only look at her." Mark slumped back into the chair burying his face in his hands. Derek walked over to Mark putting a hand on his shoulder squeezing it slightly.

"But you shouldn't give up everything for her, Mark. That's not love. Love is all about compromises. Not about giving up yourself. Lexie fell in love with _you_. Not the person you want to change into because you think it's what she wants." Derek explained.

"When did you become such a smart ass?" Mark mumbled into his hands.

"I've always been one but you never wanted to listen." Derek joked earning a slight chuckle from Mark.

"Okay then. Share your wisdom with me, Obi-Wan Kenobi." Mark deadpanned.

"Are you sure that you are ready for some Jedi trick?" Derek asked innocently.

"Bring it on, Master." Mark replied.

"Okay you asked for it. So don't complain afterwards." They both smiled at each other after Mark's successful attempt to lighten the mood with this Star Wars analogy. But Derek knew that beyond all the joking Mark still needed to hear what the smart ass in him had to say.

"She loves you and you love her. As you already said. Nothing else matters. Now the only thing that matters is ..." Derek paused briefly to emphasize what he was going to say next. To give the words more meaning. "Do you trust her enough? Do you trust her that she won't break your heart again?" Mark looked up at him thoughtfully taking his time before he answered Derek sincerely.

"Can you ever be sure? Can you ever be sure that the love will last a life time? But I can't live without her. So yes, I'm ready to take the plunge and lay my heart into her hands once again in the hope that she won't crush it this time."

"So ask her! She deserves the proposal, Mark. You know that." Derek said determinedly.

"Yeah, I know."

"So, what are you waiting for?"

"The right moment?" Mark shrugged his shoulders.

"Don't wait too long. You never know what might get in the way this time." Derek turned around and walked to the door.

"Smart ass!" Mark shouted after him and before Derek closed the door Mark saw the big grin on Derek's face causing him to smirk himself. "But you might be right on this one." Mark mumbled into the empty room.

~M&L~

When Mark entered his apartment he heard a voice coming from the room he had rearranged to be Sofia's room. He was surprised to hear that it was Lexie's. Of course Lexie had made efforts over the last month to deal with the fact that he had a child now and that he was a package deal. But he didn't hear any other voices. As far as he knew Lexie hadn't been alone with Sofia until now. Curious to hear what she told his daughter when no one else was around he stopped in the kitchen.

Lexie stood in front of the dresser changing Sofia's diaper. Totally oblivious that someone just entered the apartment. Playing with Sofia's legs Lexie just chattered away. There was something comforting about talking to a baby. They weren't able to talk back and they would never tell someone what you told them.

"You know that you have the same smile as your dad, right? I pity the boys already. They won't have any chance to resist you. You will charm their pants off when you are older."

Hearing Lexie talk to his daughter like that made Mark smile broadly. He knew that you could get carried away sometimes talking to a baby.

"But your future boyfriends have to dress warmly when they'll meet your dad for the first time. But believe me he only wants to protect you. But you will have to fight some battles when you are starting dating. That's for sure." Lexie smiled down at Sofia and was rewarded with a smile from the child.

"But I hope I'll be there to hold him back a little bit. Because I love your dad and I really hope that I will be in both of your lives in about sixteen years. I don't think you 'll come anywhere near boys before that age. Your dad will scare them all away." Lexie chuckled slightly.

"Can I tell you a secret? But you can never tell your dad because I think his ego will blow out of proportion if he will ever know. Not that he don't know about this already. But to get to the point. He is very charming and every time he smiles at me my legs are turning to jelly. I can't resist his smile. And his body is just … wow. Aehmm, that is perhaps not appropriate considering that we are talking about your dad. I'm sure most of your friends in high school will have a secret crush on him. So don't worry. You will never have the problem to find a date for your prom. I can see that you have his charms. So what do you think? Am I able to be a mother for you? I'm not sure about that. To be honest I wanted that his next child would be with me. But you are just too cute and I love your father. You are now a big part of his life and I want to be a part of his life too. So we have to share him. There is no way around. You and me. We have to make it work. But I'm sure we are able to make him happy, right?" Sofia looked up at her with a grin. "Okay, we are all set now. Let's hope that your dad will be home soon. Because I'm sure you miss him already as much as I do."

Mark was stunned into complete silence. He would have never expected that. Lexie really wanted to be a step mom for his child and she wanted to share her life with him. Playing with the ring case in his pocket he wondered if this would be the right moment to propose to her. But before he could make a decision Lexie walked into the living room with Sofia in her arms. He could see her blushing when she saw him standing against the kitchen counter.

"How long are you standing there?" Mark decided to lie to her. He didn't want to embarrass her. Lexie clearly didn't want him to hear what she just told his daughter.

"Just got in. Why is Sofia here?" Mark asked nonchalantly.

"Arizona is at work and Callie got an emergency call. She came over to see if anyone was home to take care of Sofia. It's my day off today so I was glad to help out. We had a nice day. I told her about the broken penis incident." Lexie told Mark with a completely straight face.

"What?" Mark gaped at Lexie in disbelief.

"Just kidding. But the look on your face was just priceless." Lexie chuckled.

Looking at the love of his life holding his daughter in her arms took his breath away. They both wore big grins on their faces and he stepped forward to take them both into an embrace. Lexie was slightly surprised but immediately put her other arm around him.

"I've missed you." Mark mumbled into Lexie's hair.

"We've missed you, too." Lexie replied.

They stood there motionlessly. It was still somehow new. The feeling to be in each others' arms again. They could have stood there forever but Sofia decided that she had enough of the tight embrace and started to wiggle in Lexie's arms.

"I think she wants to tell us that it's now her time to be in her dad's arms."

"Okay then. Hand her over." Mark took Sofia out of her arms and grinned down at her. "Hey honey, I hope you had a nice day with Lexie. Another one who will certainly spoil you."

"I don't spoil her." Mark looked at her skeptically and Lexie smiled back at him. "Well, maybe a little." She stepped closer to them and trailed a finger down Sofia's cheek. "But who can resist her. She is just too cute."

"Of course. She is a Sloan." Mark said proudly.

"And that explains everything." Lexie scoffed.

"You couldn't resist the Sloan charm the first time. How do you think you can resist it the second time? Especially combined with her baby charm."

"You are right. I have no chance."

Mark smiling down at her, his daughter in his arms made her heart swell. That was it. She wanted this. Exactly this. She wanted Mark in her life. She wanted him to come home to her and their children every night. She was ready. Ready for marriage. Ready for children. Now the only question was if Mark was ready to trust her again. To trust her with his heart and his daughter.

~M&L~

Lexie woke up well rested. They had spent a quiet evening at home with Sofia. Callie came back around nine o'clock to take Sofia back to their apartment and Lexie fell asleep in Mark's arms on the couch. She woke up when he carried her into bed two hours later. When he put her down on the bed she pulled him down with her and they made love before they fell asleep in each others' arms. Lexie could remember when Mark kissed her good-bye this morning. She turned around and looked at the clock. She still had two hours until she had to be at the hospital. But maybe if she arrived earlier she had the chance to see Mark and have a little make-out session with him in his office.

The moment Lexie stepped into the hospital an uneasiness overwhelmed her. She didn't know where it came from but something drew her towards the emergency room. She entered through the doors and saw Meredith and Derek who rushed inside with a gurney. Meredith looked up and spotted Lexie. She turned around and talked to Derek for a few seconds before she walked towards Lexie. Lexie's gaze snapped back to the gurney before Meredith blocked her vision.

"What's going on?" Lexie asked with a slight quiver in her voice.

"Lexie, ..." Lexie tried to push Meredith aside. Something was wrong. She could see it in Meredith's face. But Meredith hold her back. "Stop, Lexie!"

"What? What happened?" Lexie glanced back at the gurney having a better look now at the patient that was laying on it. "Oh my god. Is this Mark? It's Mark. Oh my god. What happened?"

"He was in a car accident." Meredith grabbed her shoulders trying to calm Lexie down. But the moment Lexie fully comprehend that Mark was laying on the gurney she tried to rush forward. Meredith tightened her grip but Lexie fought against her in a desperate attempt to get to Mark.

"Let me go, Meredith. Let me go. I need to be with him." Lexie shouted at her sister.

"No."

But Meredith wasn't able to hold Lexie back. She got out of her grip and ran towards the trauma room. Pushing the door open Lexie locked eyes with Derek before she rushed to the gurney. When she looked at Mark's shattered body laying on the gurney she took in a sharp breath before she looked up at Derek clutching the metal rails of the gurney so hard that her knuckles went white.

"Derek, I need him. I can't lose him. I just got him back. Please, Derek. You have to save him. Please." Lexie pleaded with a trembling voice the first tears forming in her eyes.

Derek caught Meredith's eyes and nodded silently towards the door. Meredith understood his silent request instantly and took Lexie out of the room surprisingly without any resistance on her part. Meredith knew that Derek needed her but she couldn't leave Lexie alone. As she spotted Alex at the other end of the emergency room she shouted.

"Alex! Come over here. I need you."

Alex only took one look at their faces and without any question pushed the chart of his current patient into April's hands barking out that she should take care of him. When he reached them Meredith pulled away from Lexie so that she could look into her sister's face.

"I need to help Derek. We will do everything to save him. You are not able to help him right now. Let me do it for you." Lexie nodded slightly and Meredith looked up into Alex's confused face.

"Take care of her, Alex." Alex wrapped his arm around Lexie and pulled her into him even though he had still no idea what was going on.

"It's Mark." Meredith didn't need to elaborate. Alex understood immediately and his grip tightened around Lexie's shoulder.

"Go. I'm staying with her."

~M&L~

It took hours until Meredith and Derek walked towards them. It wasn't a good sign. Lexie knew that her sister would have come out sooner to inform her about Mark's status. The fact that she didn't made Lexie's stomach flip and the earnest look on both of their faces told her that she should expect the worse. Lexie stood up on shaky legs gripping Alex's arm for support. As Derek and Meredith stopped in front of her she didn't let them say a word.

"Is he ..." But Lexie couldn't finish the sentence. She didn't want to say it out loud.

"He is stable, Lexie. But his injuries are severe. Multiple internal bleedings. We were able to stop them all. But there was also a bleeding in his brain." Derek paused and averted his gaze to the floor.

Lexie watched Derek's face intently. He was holding back something. She could see it.

"I'm not a normal family member, Derek. What are you not telling me?" Lexie asked her fingers digging deeper into Alex's flesh.

"He is in a coma, Lexie." Without Alex holding her up Lexie would have fallen to the floor.

"What are the odds, Derek?" Lexie whispered barely audible.

"You know that I can't say anything about it. We can just wait and hope."

"Derek, don't talk to me like that. You're a world class neurosurgeon. You have experienced like what … five hundred cases like this. What are the odds that he will wake up without any brain damage?" Lexie's voice got louder with every word.

"I'm sorry, Lexie. I..." As Lexie saw the shaking of Derek's hands she gulped hard. Derek looked up at her with tired eyes before he took in a deep breath. "Fifty-fifty."

"Fifty-fifty?" Lexie exhaled the breath she was holding.

"Fifty-fifty that he will wake up, Lexie. I really can't tell you if there will be any brain damage. I'm sorry."

Derek wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into an embrace. Meredith could see that Lexie was only seconds away from a total break-down. After Derek left to check on Mark she pulled an arm around her sister and walked towards the next on call room with her. Remembering Alex Meredith turned her head and whispered a thank you in his direction but Alex only waved her off.

In the moment Meredith closed the door behind them Lexie slipped down to the floor and her whole body started shaking with sobs. Meredith didn't bother to pull her up but only sank to the floor beside her sister wrapping her arms around her in the futile attempt to stop the shaking. It almost broke her heart to hear her sister crying her heart out. She mumbled nonsense in her ear rubbing over her back until the sobbing subsided.

As Lexie raised her head Meredith was slightly shocked by the forlorn expression on Lexie's face. It seemed she already lost all hope.

"Meredith, what should I do without him? I can't live without him. Even as we were not together he was still there. Even though I wasn't with him he was still there. I could see him every day if I want to. But … but if he dies." Lexie stuttered out between the sobs that she apparently couldn't control.

"Lexie, don't."

"But ... I saw Derek's face. You saw it too. He isn't sure that Mark will make it."

"He said fifty-fifty." Meredith said reassuringly.

"No, Meredith. You saw him. It's bad. Really bad." Lexie bit down on her lips trying to suppress the sobs that started to raise in her throat again but failed miserably. She broke down into Meredith's arms. Meredith knew that she wasn't able to give Lexie any comfort other than to be there for her. But if Mark wouldn't make it being there for Lexie might not be enough. Lexie would never forgive herself that she walked away from him a year ago. She would never forgive herself that she had only a month with him. She would break and no one would be able to help her. No one would be able to help her get over the loss of the love of her life.

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><p><strong>Very depressing. I know. Sorry. But my muse insisted to go down this angst path and who am I to disobey. :D So are you all excited to see episode 7. I know I am. The press release totally made my day. <strong>


	7. The ring

**Sorry that it took me so long to write this chapter. But my muse was fixated on Shawn and Juliet (my other WIP) and I couldn't convince her to give me something on Mark and Lexie. But now that I've written a new chapter and a one-shot for the other pairing she calmed down a little bit and agreed to let me write this new chapter for Mark and Lexie. :D So enjoy!**

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><p><strong>Chapter 7: The ring<strong>

Meredith stood in the door watching Lexie silently. Lexie had pulled a chair beside his bed sitting as closely as she could without lying on Mark's bed. Meredith knew that Lexie was sleeping in Mark's bed during the nights. The nurses told her about it. They didn't want to throw Lexie out of his bed. After all Mark and Lexie were both doctors in this hospital.

But looking at Lexie's slumped figure Meredith knew that Lexie was barely hanging on. She should try to convince her to leave the hospital for a few hours. Studying her sister Meredith suddenly felt as if she was intruding on a special moment so she almost wanted to turn around and leave Lexie alone when Lexie somehow sensed her presence.

"You always think there's enough time to do something. It's not until it's too late you realize that's just not true." Lexie said silently her gaze fixated on the wall.

"You can't say that it's too late, Lexie. It's been only two weeks." Meredith was shocked by the desperation she could hear in Lexie's voice and she went quickly over to her.

"Carpe diem." Lexie whispered barely audible.

"What?" Meredith asked confused.

"That should have been my motto. Carpe diem. Live every day as if it is your last one. Some day you will be right." Lexie replied.

"Lexie, stop. Don't torture yourself like this."

"But it's true, Meredith. What if he never wakes up again? What if I have to live my life without him? And it's all my fault. If I hadn't left him one year ago maybe this accident would have never happened."

"What if's doesn't change a thing, Lexie. They don't bring Mark back."

"But I want him back, Meredith. I miss him so much."

As Lexie looked up at Meredith she could see the tears streaming silently down Lexie's face. Lexie didn't try to wipe them away. She didn't even seem to notice that she was crying.

"Oh, Lexie." Meredith didn't even attempt to make her sister leave the hospital when she saw Lexie's despair. She pulled a chair beside Lexie and took her hands between hers.

"I don't want to cry anymore, Meredith. But I can't stop. You would think that I would be as dry as the Sahara by now but every time I look into his face the tears well up again." Lexie looked at Meredith pleadingly. Begging her silently to do something so that the hurt would magically disappear.

"I'm so sorry, Lexie."

"I'm tired, Meredith. I'm so tired. It's so hard to get out of bed every day fearing that it is going to be another day without hearing his voice. Another day without seeing his eyes." Lexie stated in a monotone voice.

Meredith was concerned about the lifelessness Lexie was radiating. It seemed that she had put her life on hold as long as Mark was in a coma. Meredith was feeling so helpless. She wanted to help her sister, wanted to make it easier for her but she didn't know how. She couldn't bring Mark back. So she only pulled an arm around her sister and hugged her for a few silent minutes.

~M&L~

Derek stopped at the nurse station when he spotted Meredith and Lexie in Mark's room. He didn't want to disturb the sister talk. He could check on Mark later. The nurses had already told him that nothing had changed during the night so there was no need for him to go in there immediately. After a few minutes Meredith stood up and squeezed Lexie's shoulder reassuringly as she turned around and walked out of the room closing the door behind her.

When Meredith saw Derek she let out a huge breath and took the few steps to wrap her arms around him trying to find reassurance for herself in the arms of her husband.

"She is devastated, Derek." Meredith murmured into his chest. "I'm scared what will happen when she is losing the last hope that Mark will wake up."

Derek hold her in his embrace for a few minutes before he leaned back putting a finger under Meredith's chin and pulling it carefully up so that she had to look into his face.

"I have to ask you something." Derek said quietly while he caressed Meredith's cheek with his thumb.

"Okay. What is it?" Meredith asked.

Derek pulled away from her and reached into the pocket of his white coat taking out the velvet box that contained the engagement ring Mark showed him the day before his accident. "I gave Lexie all of Mark's personal stuff. Except for this." Derek opened the box and turned it around to show Meredith the ring.

"Wow, it's beautiful." Meredith exclaimed.

"Mark bought it a year ago. Before Callie told him that she is pregnant with his child. I think he wanted to propose to Lexie." Derek stated.

"You mean back then?" Meredith reached for the box and took the ring carefully out of the box to look at it more closely.

"No. Well, he apparently wanted to propose back then. But I think he seriously considered to ask her now. Do you think I should give it to her?" Derek asked and Meredith put the ring back and looked over her shoulder to the now closed door of Mark's room.

"If Mark would be a normal patient I would say no. Normally I would say that we shouldn't tell the woman that the man wanted to propose to her. But it's Mark and Lexie we are talking about. She is my sister and Mark is your best friend. That changes everything." Meredith replied.

"But would it do any good if I give it to her or would it increase her pain even more." Derek looked at Meredith questioningly.

"Honestly, I don't know. But I think she deserves to know that Mark bought an engagement ring for her, Derek. She deserves the truth. Maybe it'll help."

"You are right. I think Mark would want her to have it." Derek put the box back in his pocket , grabbed Mark's chart and walked into his room.

~M&L~

"Something new?" Lexie blurted the question out the moment Derek entered the room.

Derek only shook his head and made some notes in the chart looking back and forth between the monitors and the paper. When he was finished he flipped the chart shut and put it carefully on Mark's bed before he went to the door and turned the lock.

"What's going on, Derek?" Lexie asked surprised.

"I need to give you something and I don't want anyone to interrupt us." Derek stated.

"What is it?"

"I'm holding onto it for two weeks now."

"It has something to do with Mark." Lexie assumed.

"Yes. I gave you all his personal stuff but I wasn't sure if I should give you this special item as well. It's huge." Derek explained.

"So you don't have it with you? Was it in his car?"

"No. I'm not talking about the size. I mean that it's kind of a big deal."

"Derek, I'm really not in the mood to play any games right now. So either you give it to me or you leave us alone." Lexie stated exasperatedly.

"You are right, sorry. Meredith said that you deserve the truth and that it might help. At least a little bit."

Lexie took in a sharp breath when she saw Derek pulling the small velvet box out of his pocket. Holding it in her direction Lexie reached for it with trembling hands and took it carefully. Stroking over the velvet she waited a few seconds before she opened it. Seeing the ring Mark had bought for her the ever-present tears burned in her eyes again.

"When ..." Lexie bit her lip to hold her emotions in check before she continued. "When did he buy it?"

"A year ago." Derek replied.

"A year ago?" Lexie looked up from the ring with shimmering eyes.

"Yes. He told me about it a day before ..." Derek stopped abruptly.

"Before the accident." Lexie finished his sentence.

"I surprised him in his office while he was looking at it. That's when he told me the story."

"Why did he have it with him?" Lexie's gaze returned to the delicate band in the velvet box.

"What?" Derek asked confused.

"Why did he carry the ring around with him? I mean, when he bought it already a year ago why did he take it out of the closet or wherever he had kept it."

"Isn't it obvious? He wondered if it was too soon to propose to you. If you were ready to marry him or if he would scare you away."

"He was afraid I might run." Lexie stated sadly.

"You've already run away from him twice, Lexie."

"I know. But I wouldn't have run this time. I love him, Derek. I want to spend the rest of my life with him." Taking the ring out of the box Lexie whispered barely audible. "I would have said yes if he had asked me."

Lexie turned her gaze towards Mark and Derek left the room silently to give her some space to process the fact that Mark had wanted to propose to her. Lexie struggled to prevent the tears from falling again and inspected the ring closer. It was beautiful. Exactly what she would have chosen for herself. When she turned the ring into the light she discovered the engraving and she lost the battle to hold her tears in check when she deciphered the meaning of the nine letters.

_You are the one who put me back together_

Lexie closed her fist around the ring pressing it into her palm. Her gaze returned to Mark in the hospital bed. He was her soul mate. Maybe she had put him back together. But the last year without him had showed her that she wasn't complete without Mark. He was the one who made her whole. Lexie walked to the bed and sat down beside Mark. Her one hand was still clutched around the ring while she traced his jawline with a finger of her other hand.

"I'm so sorry, Mark. Sorry that you were afraid of losing me again. Sorry that you still couldn't trust me completely. But I'm ready now. Ready for everything you always wanted. Because I want it too. I want it with you." She leaned forward and pressed a light kiss on his lips. "I would have said yes, Mark."

Lexie closed her eyes while her lips brushed over his when she suddenly felt a movement. Totally baffled she sat up again and looked down at Mark. He groaned and his eye lids began to flutter.

"Mark?" Lexie asked breathlessly. "Mark? Can you hear me?"

Lexie wanted to shake him, wanted to force him to open his eyes and when Mark finally opened his eyes and looked at her seeing his blue eyes again knocked the breath out of her.

"Where am I?" Mark whispered with a rasping voice.

"Oh my god, Mark. You are back." Lexie pressed another kiss on his lips before she realized that he tried to push her away. Lexie backed away and looked at him questioningly seeing that his brows were furrowed with confusion. Lexie could hardly contain her excitement but with Mark's next words every happiness Lexie was feeling vanished in a heartbeat.

"Who are you?"

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><p><strong>I already mentioned that I'm an angst fan. Did I mention that I am a fan of cliffhangers too? But only if I write them myself. I hate to read them. So I'm well aware of the fact that cliffhangers are mean but this is where my muse took me so far and I thought you might want to read a new chapter before tomorrow's episode. So don't shoot me. :D<strong>


	8. The memory loss

**I promised a chapter on Tuesday. Well, it's Tuesday. So enjoy! :D**

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><p><strong>Chapter 8: The memory loss<strong>

"Lex, are you okay?" Meredith found Lexie in a supply closet sitting on the floor.

"The only thing that matters right now is that Mark is awake again." Lexie said without looking up from her lap, her fingers wrapped around a small object.

"Maybe the memory loss is only temporary. You know that this can happen."

"Yeah, maybe." When Lexie finally looked up Meredith could see that she didn't believe it. "Maybe you should give him the ring back." Lexie stretched her hand out and Meredith could see the velvet box in Lexie's hand..

"No, if someone gives him the ring back you should be the one." Meredith slid down until she was sitting directly beside her sister.

"I think it's not a good idea to confuse him even more right now. Don't tell him about me, Meredith." Lexie stated quietly.

"What? You can't be serious." Meredith said incredulously.

"Promise me. He has to struggle enough. He can't remember Sofia either. I think it's already too much for him to deal with the fact that he has a daughter with Callie. Have you seen his face when Callie told him? He lost his memory of the last four years, Meredith. I don't want to burden him with me in addition to everything else."

"You know that you are not a burden for him."

"But right now he can't remember that I'm his girlfriend. He can't remember me at all. Let's keep it that way until he feels a little better. Okay?" Lexie looked pleadingly into her eyes.

"It's your decision, Lexie." Meredith didn't know if this was the right decision. She thought that Mark had the right to know about them. But she wouldn't tell him. It should come from Lexie. But one look at Lexie's face told Meredith that it woulnd't happen in the near future and Lexie's next words confirmed her suspicion.

"And I decide to keep it from him. For now." Lexie stated determined.

~M&L~

"Dr. Sloan, how are you today?" Lexie entered his room without looking directly into his face. She couldn't stay away. She had to see him. When he would be discharged he would be back in his apartment and she would hardly see him.

"Call me Mark, Dr. Grey."

"But only if you call me Lexie."

"Okay, Lexie." Hearing him saying her name made her shiver but she suppressed it immediately. "So how are you?"

"Fine. I think. It's still a little weird that I can't remember the last four years but it's getting better." Mark replied.

"That's good to hear." Lexie studied his chart while Mark watched her from his bed and suddenly a strange feeling overcame him.

"Do I know you? Scratch that. Of course I should know you. You are working as a doctor here at the hospital. But something is … I don't know how to call it ... different?"

"Yes, we know each other." Lexie didn't look up. She didn't want to look into Mark's eyes.

"Did we have a lot of cases together?"

"Every now and then." Lexie didn't consider it a complete lie. Because it was true. They weren't working on cases together all the time, they had only spent every free minute of the last two months with each other.

When Lexie walked beside his bed to have a look at his scar Mark put a hand on her arm and a jolt went through Lexie. She snatched her arm away and when she looked into Mark's eyes she saw that he had felt it too. She needed to get out of his room. Immediately.

"I have to go. But Derek will be here any minute. He'll check the scar."

"Lexie, what just happened?" Mark sat up in his bed and tried to reach her to hold her back but she already retreated in the direction of the door.

"I don't know what you are talking about."

Lexie rushed out of his room and left a confused Mark behind. He had felt a sudden rush when he touched Lexie's arm. It was strange. He decided that he would talk to Derek about it. Maybe he could shed some light on this.

~M&L~

"Derek, I have to ask you something about Dr. Grey." Mark said while Derek lifted the bandage around his head to examine his scar.

"You mean Lexie?" Derek asked.

"Yes." Derek pulled a chair beside Mark's bed and sat down crossing his legs and folding his arms across his chest.

"Okay. Shoot."

"This sounds crazy, but … there is something between her and me. I can't describe it. When she is around I just feel … something. How good did I know her? Were we friends?"

"I won't call it friends." Derek knew that he wouldn't get away with it. Meredith promised Lexie to not tell Mark anything about them. But Lexie didn't talk to him and Mark was his best friend.

"So what was it, Derek?"

"How shall I put it?" Derek stalled.

"Spit it out." Mark replied impatiently.

"You were absolutely and head over heels in love with each other." Derek blurted out.

"What?" Mark's face went white and he clutched his hand around his sheet looking bewildered at Derek.

"Love. All-consuming, almost unbearable love with a lot of ripping off each other's clothes I imagine." Derek smirked when he remembered how often he had seen them coming out of an on call room or a supply closet.

"But I can't remember anything."

"I know." Derek's smile faltered when he saw the confusion on Mark's face.

"She never said anything."

"She didn't want to upset you. She thought Sofia was already a big enough surprise."

"So she never intended to tell me?" Mark asked slightly peeved.

"She wanted to wait until you are better." Derek defended Lexie's decision.

"But it might be that I'll never remember her."

"That might be the reason why she hesitated. I shouldn't have said anything. But I was there. The whole time, Mark. I saw all the ups and downs of your relationship and you two are meant for each other. You drive each other crazy. You fight, you shout at each other but … She is the love of your life and you are hers. You are both miserable when you are apart from each other. You can't live without each other." Derek explained.

"Then how could I forget her?" Mark asked with disbelief in his voice. He was clearly upset about the fact that he apparently didn't remember the love of his life.

"I don't know. But don't tell her that you know, Mark. She's been through a lot lately. She doesn't deserve that you are with her out of a false sense of obligation. When you go back to her you should go back to her because you love her. I don't mean that you must wait until you get your memories back but she deserves to be loved. If you can't remember her, Mark, you just have to make new memories. You fell in love with her once even though everything was against you two at the time. There is no reason that it won't happen again. You are still the same person. Even though you can't remember loving her right now you still love her. I'm not sure if this makes sense."

"No. I understand. I think. So you mean that some part of me, maybe my soul, is still in love with her, that only my brain isn't remembering her?" Mark asked a little disbelievingly.

"Yeah, something like that."

"So I just need to connect both parts again?" Mark asked uncertainly.

"We sound crazy, aren't we?" Derek shook his head chuckling slightly.

"A little I guess. But something in me is clearly remembering her. I felt it, Derek." Mark told him.

"You two just need some time. Take her out on a date when you are out of here. Take small steps. It will work out eventually."

~M&L~

"Lexie, I'll be discharged today." Mark informed Lexie the moment she entered the room.

"I know." Lexie replied quietly.

"So I need to ask you something." Mark stated eagerly.

"Of course." Lexie closed his chart and looked up at him waiting for his question.

"Will you go out on a date with me?" Mark blurted out.

"A date?" Lexie asked.

"I think there is definitely chemistry between us. So I think we should give it a shot. Or are you seeing someone currently?" Mark felt strange talking to Lexie like that. After talking to Derek it felt ridiculous. He knew that she wasn't seeing anyone because she was his own girlfriend. But he promised Derek that he wouldn't tell Lexie that he knew about that fact.

"No. I'm not seeing someone currently." Lexie replied.

"So you will go out on a drink with me?" Lexie studied Mark's face and saw that he apparently really wanted to go out on a date with her and she missed him so much the last weeks so she gave in.

"Yeah, why not?" Lexie answered him.

"Nine o'clock? Joe's bar?"

"I'll be there." Lexie smiled.

"Looking forward to it." Mark smirked.

~M&L~

This evening reminded Lexie a lot of the evening where she was sitting at the bar after she refused to scrub in on Mark's surgery because she helped out George. They were even talking about her photographic memory. Lexie just joked that it was sometimes a little crowded in her head with all this information when Mark's smile faltered and he furrowed his brows.

"What is it, Mark?" Lexie asked quickly. "Do you have a headache? We can go if you don't feel good. Better let's go have Derek check it."

"No. I'm fine. I just had a strange sense of déjà vu. Did we have this conversation before?" Mark looked questioningly in Lexie's eyes and Lexie had to hold her breath. Did he remember something?

"Yeah, we talked about my photographic memory before." Lexie stated.

"Periodic table!" Mark suddenly shouted.

"What?" Lexie replied confused.

"I did ask you to recite the periodic table." Mark stated happily.

"Yes, you did. Do you remember anything else?" Lexie asked excitedly.

Mark furrowed his brows in concentration and Lexie balled her hands into fists in anticipation but then Mark looked up at her and shook his head.

"No. I'm sorry, Lexie." Mark answered disappointed.

"Don't worry. Let's just have some drinks together and talk." Lexie smiled shakily.

The rest of the evening was somehow strained. They talked about nothing and everything and he enjoyed it but something was off. So he decided to end the charade when they stepped out of the bar into the cold night. Mark stopped Lexie with a hand on her arm and pulled her to the side of the boardwalk to gave them some privacy.

"Why are you doing this, Lexie?" Mark asked softly.

"What do yo mean?" Lexie replied questioningly.

"Why don't you tell me?" Mark stated exasperatedly.

"Tell you what?" Lexie still had no clue what he was talking about.

"Lexie, don't! You know what I mean." It took her a few moments before she realized that someone obviously told him.

"Who told you?"

"Derek."

Lexie looked in the blue eyes of the man she loved more than anything else in her life and was overwhelmed by a sudden rush of sadness. He was right. It hadn't been fair. Nothing had been fair and everything she suppressed over the last few weeks came to the surface when she exploded into his face.

"What do you expect me to say, Mark? That it feels like my heart gets ripped out every time I see you because you can't remember us. Is that what you want to hear? Sometimes it feels like I can't breathe. Even though you are standing right in front of me you are not here. I love you, Mark. But you don't remember loving me and I don't know how long I can take it seeing you every day and not being able to touch you, kiss you. I … I just can't do this, Mark." Lexie's eyes glossed over with tears.

"Can't do what?" Mark asked softly.

"Pretending that I don't know you. It's killing me, Mark. I … I have to go." Lexie turned around whipping the tears away that were streaming down her cheeks.

"Lexie, stop." Mark pleaded.

"No, Mark. Please. Let me go. I can't talk to you right now. It hurts too much." Lexie chocked out between sobs.

Reluctantly Mark let go of Lexie's arm and gazed after her while she hurried away from him. Hearing her words and seeing her tears had ripped his heart out too. He wanted to remember her. He had to remember her. He wouldn't accept that he had to let her walk away. He wanted his memories back.

~M&L~

"You can't force it, Mark." Derek stated quietly.

"Derek, you didn't see her. She was so hurt. I can't live with the fact that I'm the reason she is so devastated. I need to remember, Derek." Mark replied desperately.

"Mark, I understand that ..." Derek began but was interrupted by Mark's angry voice.

"No. You don't understand. You can't. You have no idea what it feels like to know that you forgot the love of your life. That it's like she never existed." Mark shouted. "You said that we can't live without each other. How can she go on with her life when you are right, Derek? How can I go on with my life knowing what could have been if I would only remember?"

Derek could see the tears forming in Mark's eyes. His best friend wasn't very emotional. He couldn't remember the last time he saw him cry. But he couldn't help him. He couldn't bring his memories back. He wasn't god.

"I don't know, Mark. But I'm here for you." Derek told him.

"I know. Thank you, Derek." Mark replied quietly.

~M&L~

"I have to move on, Meredith." Lexie said determined.

"Are you crazy, Lexie?" Meredith asked totally surprised.

"I can't do it. I can't see him every day. I just can't. I asked for a transfer to Boston." Lexie told her sister.

"Lexie, you can't give up. Mark needs you." Meredith tried to reason with Lexie.

"That's the point, Meredith. He doesn't need me. He doesn't know who I am. Maybe I am a coward. But every time I see him it cuts me up inside. I can't live like that." Meredith could see the deep dark circles under Lexie's eyes. The red rims that told her that Lexie had cried all night long.

"I can't convince you?" Meredith tried to change her mind. She wasn't sure if it would really help Lexie to run away from Mark. He would be still in her heart.

"No, Meredith. I made my decision. I have to go." Meredith had to give up. Lexie wouldn't change her mind. She was stubborn like hell and Meredith could see how much the whole situation took a toll on her sister. She had to let her go.

"I'm going to miss you little sis." Meredith said softly.

"I'll miss you too." Lexie replied.

Lexie hugged Meredith tightly before she turned around and walked away. Meredith stood stock still following her with her eyes. Suddenly Derek appeared by her side.

"What was that about?" Derek asked curiously.

"What I was fearing from the beginning." Meredith wrapped her arm around Derek and buried her head into his chest.

"And that was?"

"She is devastated, Derek." Meredith stated sadly.

"Because of Mark." Derek didn't word it like a question. He saw Mark just a minute ago. He knew what happened yesterday after their date.

"She is transferring to Boston." Meredith told her husband.

"What? She is moving away?" Derek asked surprised.

"Maybe it's for the best. Look at her. She can't go on like that." Meredith said.

"How should I tell Mark?"

"You don't."

"But he is my best friend."

"No, Derek. This time we have to let Lexie decide for herself when she wants to tell him. If she is going to tell him at all. We interfered enough. It's up to them now."

* * *

><p><strong>I wish you all a great ep on Thursday. Let's keep all our fingers crossed and everything else that is able to be crossed that we'll get a JL break-up scene. I want Jackson gone. He was in the way long enough. LOL. See you hopefully soon. **


	9. Saying goodbye

**First off thanks to all of my reviewers. I know I always thank you all personally but I thought it's time to thank you here too. Your reviews always put a smile on my face no matter how crappy the day is. So thank you very much that you take the time to leave a review.**

**Just so you know. I wrote the second paragraph already before the ep on Thursday. I'm a psychic. LOL. Enjoy!**

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 9: Saying good-bye<strong>

Lexie slipped into the gallery and sat down in the darkest corner. The room was packed with interns, residents and attendings. Everyone wanted to see Mark's first surgery after the coma. Most of them were there for support but there were also the haters. Mark was an extremely successful surgeon in his specialty and he never seemed to fail in the OR. Lexie could see in some faces that they were hoping that he would screw up. But she wasn't worried. Mark might be insecure when it came to his private life but professionally he never ceased to amaze her. It was a relatively easy procedure and he would perform it as if nothing ever happened.

Lexie never got tired of watching Mark in the OR during surgery. The calmness and confidence he radiated even now was incredible. As she looked down to him she remembered another time she had watched one of Mark's surgeries. The one where Sadie told her that Mark was checking out her ass. A small smile appeared on her lips when she recalled where this night had ended. With her knocking on his door followed by mind-blowingly fantastic sex. He definitely lived up to his reputation. But there was so much more to their relationship than just sex. They immediately connected on a whole other level too. They were soul mates.

Lexie clenched her teeth to prevent the tears from falling. Again. She had cried the whole night. It needed to stop. All of it. Therefore she had made that decision. The decision to leave Seattle and Mark. Maybe she could come back after some time had passed. So that wasn't very likely. She wouldn't be able to see Mark with another woman. Deep down Lexie knew that running away was the easy way out, that she should stay and fight for their love. But she couldn't do it. So she would run. But not without telling him. He deserved to hear it from her that she was going.

Lexie waited for Mark outside of the OR. When he opened the door and saw her standing there his eyes widened in surprise and a smile appeared on his face. But when he saw the redness of her eyes it fell immediately and was replaced by a worried expression. The feeling of sadness that had accompanied her since she had yelled at him in front of Joe's bar deepened even further when he looked into his eyes. She would never love anyone in her life as much as she loved him. How could she leave him?

Lexie balled her hands into fists while they were standing only a few feet apart from each other. No one wanted to make the first move, no one wanted to break the silence. Finally Lexie broke the eye contact and averted her gaze to the ground. When she looked up again she cleared her throat briefly before she asked Mark quietly.

"Do you have a second, Mark? I need to talk to you."

Mark looked at her for a few seconds before he silently nodded and Lexie hurried away to an on call room. When she shut the door behind him the room suddenly closed in on her. She couldn't talk to him in an on call room. There were just too many memories connected with these rooms. Memories that only hurt.

"Sorry, Mark. I ... I can't talk to you in here. I would explain it but I think this might be just a little too much information considering that you have no idea why I'm freaking out about you being in an on call room. With me. Alone." Lexie rambled.

"Lexie, I don't understand." Mark replied confused.

"I know. Just ... let's talk on the roof. Okay?" Lexie said quietly.

"It's freezing outside, Lexie."

"Oh … of course. We have November."

"I have no idea why we can't talk here but you feel clearly uncomfortable so let's go to the locker room." Seeing Lexie's eyes widen when he mentioned the locker room he furrowed his brows. "What? We can't talk there either."

"Yes. I mean no. We can't talk in the locker room. Let's go to the roof. We don't have to go outside. We can stay in the stairway."

After all they were no memories connected with the stairway. That was a Meredith and Derek thing. Mark and she always preferred close rooms where they can lock the door behind them. Maybe because they had never been able to keep their hands from each other. Especially after a fight.

Shaking her head to get rid of the feeling of Mark's hands on her Lexie left the on call room and went straight to the stairs pushing the door open she took two steps at once to get to the roof. She wanted to get it over with before she would change her mind.

Mark had no idea what happened that made Lexie all worked up. But he followed her without any further questions. He would find out soon enough. When they reached the door to the roof Mark leaned against the railing crossing his arms over his chest.

"Okay. I'm listening. What do you want to tell me?" Mark asked. Lexie gulped hard to suppress the tears that she felt were rising again. She would not cry in front of him again. She took in a deep breath fixating her eyes on his chest not able to look him in the eyes.

"I thought you should know. I'm moving to Boston."

"You are doing what?" Mark shouted angrily, his arms falling to his side, he took one step towards Lexie. Lexie's eyes shot up to his face when she heard the anger in his voice.

"Transferring to another hospital. I think it's the best for both of us." Lexie tried to explain while she retreated back until she hit the railing. Mark stood directly in front of her. His eyes full of fury and hurt. But when he realized that Lexie looked up at him with fear in her eyes he took two steps back and all the anger rushed out of him leaving him only with a feeling of betrayal.

"How can you leave me, Lexie?" Mark asked incredulously.

"Mark, please. Don't make it harder than it already is. I already explained it to you. Maybe I'm weak. But I can't deal with the fact that I'm the only one who remember our time together. You want to know why I couldn't talk to you in the on call room? Do you really wanna know?" Lexie didn't wait for his answer. She shoved her hand in his chest so that Mark stumbled one step back. "Because we had sex in there. Every free minute we had we met in an on call room and jumped each other. We had mind-blowingly fantastic sex with each other. But what hurts the most is that you can't remember that we also spent evenings where we only talked for hours. God, Mark. We are soul mates. At least we were. I could talk to you about everything. You always said the right things. You always knew what I was feeling."

Lexie stood in front of him panting, her body shaking with suppressed emotions. So Mark did the only thing he could think of right now. He pulled her into his embrace and Lexie buried her head into his chest. Inhaling deeply she smelled his scent and being in such close proximity she couldn't help herself. She slipped her fingers under his shirt and trailed them over his spine. Feeling his skin again after what felt like an eternity made her dizzy.

Mark tightened his arms even further around her when he felt Lexie's fingers on his skin. She barely touched him but he could still feel it. It definitely felt familiar. Holding Lexie in his arms. He knew that he had held her in his arms a million times like this. But he couldn't remember it and that's what was driving her away. He knew it was over when he felt her stiffen in his arms and he desperately tried to burn the feeling of Lexie in his arms into his memories.

It was over. Lexie knew she had to step away from him. Every second in Mark's arms would make it harder to leave. As she took a step back she let her hand slip around to his stomach and when she felt his abs under her fingers she could hear her heart break. She lost the love of her life and she would never be the same again.

The moment Mark lost the last contact to Lexie when she stepped away a feeling of emptiness overwhelmed him. Lexie looked one last time into his eyes before she turned around and started to walk down the stairs.

"The Lexie Grey I know wouldn't walk away like that." Mark said in a last attempt to change her mind. But when Lexie's eyes met his he saw that it was futile. She had made her decision. He would lose her. Forever.

"Well, that's the problem, right? You don't know me. So please. Just let me go, Mark."

They hold each other's gazes for a few seconds before Lexie turned around again and walked away. Mark stood frozen in his place. Something about seeing Lexie walking away from him was strangely familiar but he couldn't put his finger on it. The only thing he was certain about was that she took a part of his heart with her.

* * *

><p><strong>I'm already writing on the next chapter. So no threats please. :D I'm sure we are all still on a high after last episode because … it's over. Lexie is single again and we were told that Mark and Lexie are soul mates. Yiphhheeeee!<strong>


	10. Bruises

**Chapter 10: Bruises**

Suddenly Mark gripped the railing and tears sprang into his eyes, blurring his vision. He remembered. The memories were flooding back into his brain. Not some blurry pictures. Everything was crystal clear. It was as if a dam had been broken. He remembered her again. Lexie was almost at the end of the stairs when Mark shouted after her.

"Alexandra Grey, don't you dare walk away from me again."

"Excuse me?" Lexie stopped dead in her tracks and turned around slowly, looking surprised up to Mark.

"I thought we agreed to stop with the running away." Mark walked slowly down to her, his eyes locked with hers, a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips.

"What?" Lexie asked, now totally confused.

"Didn't we agree only two months ago that we'll try everything to make it work? That you won't run away again? And now you are giving up that easily?" Mark stood now only one step above her, his eyes still glistened with unshed tears but couldn't help that a big smile erupted on his face. He could pinpoint the exact moment Lexie finally realized what he was trying to tell her and she clapped her hands over her mouth.

"Oh my god. You remember." Mark stumbled backwards when Lexie threw herself into his arms but tightened his grip immediately around her waist to steady them both.

"Every detail, Little Grey. Especially you telling me to teach you." Lexie bent back a little to look into Mark's face. She smiled happily even though tears of joy were running down her face.

"More." Lexie begged.

"You want more memories. Okay. Let me think." Mark smirked. "You are the one who put me back together, you are the one who told me that we are beautiful, the one who convinced me that we are worth fighting for. I remember how much my hand hurt after I hit Derek."

"More." Lexie repeated smiling like crazy the tears almost ceased. Mark cradled her face into his hand brushing his thumbs over her cheeks to wipe away the last remnants of her tears before he wrapped his arms around her once again.

"Making love to you. Though I think most of the time you have to call it sex. Wild, uncontrolled and dirty sex. Oh yeah, I definitely remember that. Wall sex with you. How could I ever forget that?" Mark said mischievously.

"Get your mind out of the gutter, Mark Sloan." Lexie smacked him playfully over his chest, the big smile still on her face.

"Why? I'm McSteamy after all and don't tell me that you don't think about it too right now." Mark grinned from ear to ear.

"I'm always thinking about having sex with you. All the time. You know that damn well, Mark." Lexie stated.

"So what are we waiting for?" Mark asked, waggling his eyebrows suggestively.

"Now? Here?" Lexie replied.

"Never stopped us before."

"On call room?" Lexie asked, her smile growing even wider.

"Let's go." Mark started to let Lexie out of his embrace but Lexie stopped him.

"Wait. Give me a second."

"For what?" Mark asked curiously.

"Trying to realize that this is not a dream." Lexie told him quietly.

"It's not." Mark pulled her into him again and kissed her passionately. "Convinced."

"Hmmm … I might need some more convincing." Lexie replied and Mark laughed out loud.

"Okay. I can do that."

They almost fell down the stairs when they hurried towards the next on call room. It always was like this between them. One moment they were fighting or unhappy and in the next moment they were all over each other. Lexie knew that it was ridiculous to drag Mark to the next on call room considering what happened just a few minutes ago in the stairway. She wanted to leave him. Wanted to get away from the overwhelming feeling of sadness. But now she wanted nothing more than feel him in her. Wanted to surround him. She needed to feel him moving inside her to realize that Mark was really back.

What was it that one moment he almost started to cry and in the next he was so aroused that he had to hold himself back to not throw Lexie against the next wall and have his way with her? This rollercoaster of emotions they were on over the last couple of minutes totally threw him. Not to mention that he still felt dizzy from the rush of memories that had suddenly filled his brain. Maybe it wasn't such a bad idea after all to have sex the instant he got his memories back. They needed to connect. Needed to forget the real world for a few minutes.

Lexie nearly tossed him into the on call room when they finally reached one. She slammed the door shut and turned the lock. But before she could turn around Mark pinned her against the door and Lexie melted instantly into him.

"You can't imagine how much I missed the feeling of you behind me." Lexie murmured.

Lexie stretched out her arms and pushed her hips back into Mark feeling his arousal pressed hard into her.

"Only behind you?" Mark whispered.

"On me, over me, in me." Lexie groaned slightly when Mark began to rock slowly against her ass. "Pick one. Wait, scratch that. Take all."

"Might be difficult to do all at once." Mark chuckled.

"Don't care. Just do something, Mark." Lexie replied breathlessly.

"At the moment I think I'm happy with being behind you." Lexie already started to protest when Mark brushed her hair aside and began to nibble his way up from her collarbone to her ear whispering hoarsely into it when he reached it. "Are _you_ happy with it?"

"I ..." Lexie trailed off when Mark intertwined his fingers with hers, plastering her against the door, pressing his whole body into her.

"Yes?" Mark asked while his lips traveled along her jaw bone.

"Hmmm, I ..." Lexie tried to reply.

"Do you want to tell me something, Lex?" Mark asked..

"Stop teasing, Mark." Lexie exclaimed.

"Why? You don't like it."

"That's not the point. I might go up in flames if you don't do something against it very soon." Lexie told him sternly.

"And we don't want that." Suddenly Mark pulled her around and slammed her back into the door knocking the breath out of her for a second. Staring in his blue eyes gleaming with mischievousness and burning with desire, going up in flames didn't seem to be a joke anymore. Her whole body appeared to be on fire. Her skin burned where Mark trailed his tongue over it, rubbing carefully his scruff over the most sensitive spots.

"Dr. Mark Sloan."

"Yes. That's me." Lexie had enough. The feeling of losing him was still too fresh in her mind and she couldn't take it anymore. So she pressed her back into the wall for stabilization and literally climbed onto him to wrap her legs around Mark pulling him into her. Crushing her lips on his she forced her tongue into his mouth before he could open it and kissed him with all the passion she was currently feeling inside of her. Releasing him she pulled his head further down and took his ear lobe between her teeth biting down carefully before she whispered into his ear.

"Big Sloan into Little Grey." Lexie sucked on his flesh directly under his ear and wrapped her legs more tightly around him "Now."

Mark couldn't resist her one minute longer and the moment they got rid of their clothes he took her right there and then against the wall.

After they both experienced once again mind-blowingly fantastic sex with each other, Lexie's head lay on Mark's shoulder, Mark leaned with his head against the wall, barely able to hold Lexie anymore.

"Hold on." Mark rasped and he took the few steps towards the bed so that they could collapse onto it. Lexie immediately snuggled in his embrace and Mark wrapped his arm around her, pulling her even further into him, giving her a peck on the forehead.

"I sure have some bruises now." Lexie stated contentedly.

"I wasn't very gentle. That's for sure. But it was your fault, you know?" Mark murmured into her hair.

"Yeah." Lexie said smugly.

"You like it when I'm losing it completely, aren't you?" Mark asked slightly curious.

"Well, not always. Wouldn't survive it." Lexie chuckled. "I already feel the soreness."

"But it was worth it?"

"Oh, it was so worth it." Lexie informed him.

They lay silently for a few minutes before Mark pulled back slightly, putting a finger under Lexie's chin to tilt her head up. Lexie looked up at him questioningly and Mark trailed with his thumb over her lips before he broke the silence.

"I'm so sorry, Lex." Mark said sincerely.

"For what?" Lexie asked slightly surprised.

"Not remembering you." Mark stated quietly.

"It wasn't your fault." Lexie lifted her hand and caressed his cheek, leaning forward to gave him a quick kiss on his lips before she took his hand and intertwined their fingers.

"That doesn't make it any better." Mark told her apologetically.

"No. I guess not." Lexie replied.

"But you gave up too easily."

"Maybe. I'm glad you remembered me in time to stop me."

"Me too."

"Mark?" Lexie asked softly.

"Yeah?" Mark's voice was barely audible while he trailed his other hand lazily over her spine.

"I love you." Lexie told him with a slightly choked up voice.

"I love you too, Lexie." Mark replied, pulling her back into his embrace.

They both closed their eyes and drifted off in a well deserved sleep, entangled in each other.

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><p><strong>Don't yell. :D The M-version is already up. And to all my readers who only read the T-version of this story. I'm sorry that this chapter is shorter than usual. Well, I'm a sucker for smut and I won't apologize for that. Who can blame me when you watch these two on-screen having eye sex? It's just so inspiring. LOL. So for everyone who want to read about the wall sex … go and read the M-version. :D<strong>


	11. Only one way to find out

**Where has the time gone? It's already over two weeks ago since I last updated ? Sorry for the delay. This chapter was fun to write. Especially the first part. I hope you have as much fun reading it as I had writing it. :D**

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><p><strong>Chapter 11:<strong> **Only** **one way to find out**

Cristina almost ran into Meredith when she rounded the corner, shoving chips into her mouth to make up for the breakfast she hadn't had the time to eat this morning. Meredith didn't even greet her but stared intently in the opposite direction.

"Something interesting over there?" Cristina mumbled around another handful of chips.

"Lexie! Something is different. Don't you think?" Meredith replied, wrinkling her nose when she saw Cristina shoving more chips into her mouth.

Cristina looked over to Lexie and studied her for about a minute before she turned around with a smug grin on her face.

"I know what happened."

"You do? How? What?" Meredith asked curiously.

"Follow me." Cristina grabbed her arm and started to walk towards Lexie. When they stopped two steps behind her, Cristina shouted without any preamble. "Grey, admit it." Lexie jumped up in surprise and looked at Cristina and her sister quizzically, totally clueless what Cristina was talking about.

"Admit what?"

"You know that I have some experiences in this department myself. I saw you wincing and I bet your thigh muscles are extremely sore. I know where this comes from." Cristina smirked knowingly.

"I have no idea what you are talking about." Lexie replied nonchalantly, hoping that Cristina wouldn't blurt it out in front of everyone. But she should have known better. Seeing the mischievous grin on Cristina's face, she prepared herself for the inevitable.

"Judging by the way you are walking and the dreamy look on your face … you had sex. More precisely. You had wall sex. And I assume it was with Mark, right?" Cristina told her triumphantly and Lexie couldn't prevent the blush rising on her face. Meredith's jaw dropped down and she watched astounded her sister's clear uncomfortableness that made it quite obvious that Cristina's guess was accurate.

"What? You had sex with Mark?" Meredith exclaimed incredulously. "Wait a sec. You had _sex_? With _Mark_?"

Lexie already opened her mouth before Meredith held up a hand to stop her.

"Of course with Mark. As if you would sleep with anyone else. But didn't you intend to leave tomorrow? What was it? Pity sex?"

The redness in Lexie's cheeks deepened even further when she saw that everyone within earshot stopped what they were doing. As if this hospital needed another rumor about McSteamy. Nonetheless she couldn't avoid that a big smile appeared on her face when she realized that Mark and she would create a lot more rumors in the near future. Now that they were back together again.

Waiting for an answer, Meredith studied her sister intently. She hadn't seen Lexie that happy in a very long time. The last time she looked that happy was the day before Mark's accident and suddenly she knew why Lexie smiled like crazy.

"He remembers you again!" Lexie's smile broadened even further and she nodded silently. Meredith took a step forward and hugged her tightly. "I'm so happy for you, Lexie."

Cristina rolled her eyes, waiting impatiently until Meredith released Lexie out of her grip, interrupting the emotional moment before Meredith or Lexie could start crying.

"Yeah, we all are. But much more important is ... how was it?"

"What do you mean?" Lexie asked, blinking away the tears.

"Did you get some good sex bruises?"

"Oh yeah!" Lexie replied dreamily, rubbing her ass absently.

"Ahemm, don't want to hear more about it. Just keep it to yourself. It's enough that I know that Mark is McSteamy I can imagine the rest. Very vividly." Meredith said dryly.

"What's all the commotion about?" Alex asked, suddenly emerging out of the crowd that was still gathered around them.

"We were talking about wall sex." Cristina enlightened him and Alex already wanted to ask who got lucky when his gaze fell upon Lexie.

"Sloan was banging her against the wall?" Alex pointed knowingly in Lexie's direction.

"Alex!" Lexie shouted angrily, turning bright red.

"What? You are the one who gave it away. You blushed when Christina said wall sex and of course you wouldn't jump someone else than Sloan."

"That doesn't mean you have to shout it through the whole hospital." Lexie hissed through gritted teeth.

"Come on, Lexie. Let them have some fun too. You just gave them enough to talk about for the next two weeks. Not to mention that they are all going to imagine you two against the wall."

"It can't get anymore embarrassing, can it?" Lexie said exasperatedly. "You know what? I'm leaving."

"For another round?" Cristina shouted after her and Lexie felt the urge to flip her off before she realized that another round actually seemed to be a great idea. So she turned around and grinned back at Meredith, Cristina and Alex.

"You betcha! Just have to find him and drag him home. The kitchen counter might be a good idea."

~M&L~

Derek leaned against the doorframe of Mark's office and watched Mark looking absently out of his window. Clearing his throat to get Mark's attention, he stepped into the office and walked over to Mark's desk.

"You look ..." Derek paused briefly to study him carefully when Mark turned around to face him. " ... happy? What happened?"

"I remember, Derek." Mark replied cheerfully.

"Really? That's terrific, Mark. Does Lexie already know?"

"Oh yeah, she does." Mark told him in a voice that definitely sounded as if there was more to the story than these simple words suggested.

"That sounded dirty."

"Well, it was dirty." Mark smiled broadly. "Maybe I should pin a badge against the wall. 'Here were Mark and Lexie, October 2011`. Well, actually I should write 'Here was Lexie's ass`. That would be more accurate."

"Unbelievable. You two are incorrigible. You remember her and the first thing the two of you are doing is jumping each other?" Derek shook his head in disbelief.

"We were never able to keep our hands from each other. Especially after a fight. She had just told me that she wanted to leave me. I was a little traumatized." Mark deadpanned, though Derek could see that he had to suppress the laughter.

"Traumatized? I see. So you needed special care?"

"Exactly." Mark's smile was infectious and Derek smiled back at him. It was good to see his best friend smiling like that again.

"I'm happy for you two. After everything you two have been through you deserve to be happy."

"Thank you, Derek."

Suddenly Mark's phone chirped with an incoming text message. The moment he read the message a big smile erupted on his face, making Derek wonder what the text message was about. Mark stood up abruptly, took off his lab coat and grabbed his leather jacket from the back of his seat not bothering to change out of his scrubs.

"I'm done with my surgeries for today, Derek. Can you tell Karev that he should check on my patients before he goes home?"

"Sure. Where are you going?"

"I have a meeting."

"With whom?" Derek asked suspiciously, cursing himself for asking when he saw the smug grin on Mark's face. He was sure that he didn't want to hear the answer.

"With Lexie." Mark was almost out of the door when he turned around and added. "And the kitchen counter."

~M&L~

_Two months later_

Derek entered Mark's office, finding him rummaging through the drawers of his desk with a concerned look on his face

"I could have sworn that it's here. I looked everywhere in the apartment and it was nowhere. So it has to be here." Half of the contents of the drawers were spread out over the floor. It looked as if Mark's office had been hit by a bomb.

"What are you talking about?" Derek asked, widening his eyes in surprise when Mark lost his patience and just turned a drawer over so that everything fell onto the floor.

"The engagement ring. It has to be here. Somewhere."

"Aehmm ... Mark?"

"What?" Mark asked him, slightly angry that Derek distracted him from his search.

"I have to tell you something."

"Can it wait? I'm a little busy right now." Mark said impatiently.

"Actually, it's about the ring." Mark immediately stopped searching and looked up at Derek disbelievingly.

"You know where it is?"

"Not exactly. But I know who has it." Derek admitted quietly.

"Who?" When Derek didn't answer immediately, Mark took a step in his direction and demanded with more urgency in his voice. "Spit it out."

"Lexie." Derek replied.

"Lexie?" Mark asked totally baffled. "How did that happen?"

"You had it with you when you had the car accident. At first I withheld it from Lexie. But you've should have seen her, Mark. She was devastated. Meredith and I thought that it might help her to know that you wanted to propose. And it did. Help her, I mean." Derek hoped that Mark wouldn't explode into his face. After all he gave the ring to Lexie with good intent.

"So she has the ring now?" Mark asked calmly, maybe too calmly.

"Yes." Derek replied, still nervous how Mark would react.

"So why didn't she say anything? Do you think she doesn't want to tell me because she doesn't want to marry me?"

"I don't think so. She told me that she would have said yes if you had asked her." Derek assured him.

"She would have said yes?" Mark asked excitedly before his smile faltered. "But that makes no sense. Why on earth didn't she tell me that she knows about the ring then?"

"If you want an answer you have to ask her."

"What if she's changed her mind?"

"Only one way to find out."

~M&L~

"When are you going to tell him about the ring?" Meredith asked Lexie out of the blue while they both were sitting at the kitchen table. Meredith had invited her over for breakfast because they hardly saw each other anymore since Lexie moved back in with Mark.

"Never?" Lexie replied without looking up at her sister.

"Why?" Meredith didn't understand why Lexie hadn't told Mark yet.

"He obviously doesn't remember that he bought it. Derek told me that Mark never asked him about it after his memories were back. If I tell him ... Wouldn't I kind of pressure him into asking me?" Lexie finally looked up and Meredith could see the brief flash of fear crossing her eyes.

"Hmmm ... I get your point. But the more important question is ... Do _you_ still want to marry him?" Meredith asked the only thing that really mattered. Lexie stared at her for a few seconds before she nodded.

"Yes. Yes, I do."

"So why not ask _him_?"

"You mean, I should propose to him?" Lexie asked her, slightly shocked.

"We live in the twenty-first century, Lexie. Do you really wanna waste precious time only because you are too much of a coward? Derek told me that Mark was also scared to ask _you_ because he feared that you might reject him." Meredith looked Lexie directly in the eyes before she closed in for the kill. Some people just needed a little push in the right direction. "You almost lost him, Lexie. Never forget that. I say go for it. Propose to him."

"Okay, you are right." Lexie replied determined. "But how should I propose?"

"No idea. But we'll come up with something epic."

"Wait! I already have an idea. But I need your help. And Derek's." Lexie stated excitedly.

"No problem. We're in. So what have you in mind?"

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><p><strong>Not really a cliffhanger, right? Not by my standards anyway. Not dramatic enough. LOL. I hope you enjoyed the chapter. <strong>

**Can you believe that I hadn't intended to even hint at smut in this chapter? Well, Lexie and Mark had other plans. LOL. And yes, of course I couldn't resist to write the scene on the kitchen counter. So go to the M-section if you want to read it. :D **


	12. The proposal

**I know it's been a while and unfortunately I have to tell you that this is the last chapter but it's an extra-long one.**

**Normally I only use phrases from other TV shows to incorporate it into my stories. But I used a whole scene in this chapter. It just fits so perfectly for Mark and Lexie. I only want to tell you that I'm well aware that I copied it (only the scene, not the words; well not all of them) and of course the producers and actors of the respective show deserve the credit. I'm sure a lot of you will recognize it. So enjoy! **

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><p><strong>Chapter 12: The proposal<strong>

"Hey, Mark. Do you have time for a drink?" Derek strolled into Mark's office, fulfilling his part of the plan Lexie and Meredith had explained to him just a few hours ago.

"Sorry, bro. But I have other plans for tonight. Lexie is picking me up every minute now. We are going out for dinner and I'll finally ask her about the ring." Mark put some papers back into the income folder to deal with them tomorrow and shut down his computer not even looking up at Derek.

"Not happening." Derek stated.

"What do you mean?"

"She told me fifteen minutes ago that I should bring you home because she needs to pick up her dad and drive him to the doctor or something like that. Not quite sure. She only told me in passing." Derek lied. They agreed that it would be the only way to keep Mark away from the apartment.

"Is everything okay with her dad?" Mark asked concerned, looking up at Derek with furrowed brows.

"She didn't seem stressed. So I think everything is alright. Probably only a checkup. By the way, since when do you let her drive your Porsche? I thought it's sacred. I remember you telling me that no woman on this planet will ever drive it. Never ever." Derek replied, folding his arms provocatively over his chest, raising an eyebrow in question, curious how Mark would explain it to him.

"Aehmm, ..." Mark stuttered and Derek could see that he tried desperately to find a way to explain why he let Lexie drive his car.

"How did she get you to cave in? What did you get in reward?" Derek asked. But before Mark could give him any answer Derek raised his hand to stop him. "Wait, don't tell me. Knowing you two it probably involves lots and lots of sex."

"Actually ... just to clarify, you know that Lexie is the love of my life, right?" Mark replied, shifting uncomfortably from foot to foot.

"I don't think there is anyone in this hospital who doesn't know that."

"Right. So ..." Mark trailed off and Derek smiled broadly, clearly enjoying Mark's squirming.

"Yeah?"

"You are enjoying this, aren't you?" Mark huffed, slightly peeved about Derek's obvious amusement.

"Of course. Dr. Mark Sloan letting a woman drive his Porsche? I might put it on the board for everyone to see." Derek joked lightheartedly.

"Don't you dare." Mark took one step towards Derek not sure if he was serious or not and Derek immediately raised both his hands in surrender.

"Relax. I'm not that mean. Though you wanted to tell me what you got in reward."

"Nothing." Mark mumbled almost inaudible.

"What do you mean nothing?"

"Nothing means nothing." Mark grumbled, turning around to get his jacket, hoping that Derek would just drop it. He should have known better.

"Woww ... you got it really bad."

"I know." Mark smiled happily, but his smile faltered a little bit when he heard Derek's next question.

"So how long did it take until she persuaded you into letting her drive?"

"You mean since we are together again?" Mark tried to postpone what would definitely enhance Derek's amusement even more.

"No, I mean when did she drive it for the first time?"

"It's a little embarrassing." Mark replied, still not willing to give in and tell Derek the truth.

"Why?" Derek asked curiously, seeing that Mark really didn't want to tell him. He could only think of one answer that would explain Mark's apparent discomfort and he opened his eyes wide in surprise. "No way. Don't tell me you already let her drive it after your first night together."

"Not exactly."

"What do you mean not exactly?" Derek asked and Mark realized that there was no way around it anymore.

"Not after the first night. But do you remember when I told you that I tried to resist her after our first night together and then I was just too tired to fight it anymore and I asked her to come to the hotel with me?"

"Yeah, I remember."

"That night!" Mark stated and Derek laughed out loud when he saw the sheepish look on Mark's face.

"She drove it already after only one night of sex? Woww, she really must have been good."

"She was fantastic. Not that this is any of your business. And just for the record. It had nothing to do with me letting her drive."

"Yeah, right. Mind-blowingly fantastic sex had nothing to do with it." Derek replied ironically.

"She just looked at me, Derek. Her eyes were sparkling with happiness because I couldn't resist her and then she gave me that cute smile asking me if she could drive to the hotel. And without even realizing it I gave her my keys." Mark said with a dreamy look on his face and Derek's smile broadened even more.

"Like I said. She can get everything from you. Really! This woman can wrap you around her little finger any way she wants. It's pathetic." Derek couldn't resist to tease Mark a little bit but Mark didn't take the bait.

"Maybe. But I don't mind. I love her and don't tell me that you are any better."

"Nope. We are both under the Grey spell. I admit it. So can we go now?"

"Sure. Maybe I can make her dinner later at home."

"Yeah, maybe." Derek replied, smiling inwardly, knowing that Mark wouldn't cook anything tonight.

~M&L~

"Do you think it's okay now? Do we need more candles? Or should I go and buy some roses so that I can throw some petals on the floor. No, that would be too sappy, right?" Lexie raced through the apartment, kneading her hands in agitation and Meredith had to suppress a smile when she followed her sister with her eyes.

"Lexie, slow down. It's perfect. He will only see _you_ anyway. You will knock him off his feet with the proposal."

"Are you sure?" Lexie asked and Meredith feared that Lexie could hyperventilate any second.

"Positive." Meredith and Derek had decided to not tell Lexie about the conversation between Mark and him. She knew that it was kind of mean because there was no reason for Lexie to worry about Mark's answer. Mark would definitely say yes. But Mark couldn't prepare himself either so it was only fair that Lexie was a little anxious about his reaction. But seeing Lexie like this Meredith almost regretted that she didn't tell her.

"Meredith, am I doing the right thing here?" Lexie stopped in front of the couch and plopped down on it, burying her face in her hands. Meredith walked over to her and sat down beside her. Wrapping an arm around Lexie, Meredith waited until her sister looked up at her again before she asked Lexie to clarify what she had meant.

"What do you mean? Propose to Mark?"

"I mean the whole marriage thing. Am I really ready to make such a commitment?" Lexie's voice was barely audible. Meredith pulled her around at her shoulders so that she faced her and almost couldn't resist to shake Lexie. Meredith would not allow her to turn away from this. Mark and Lexie belonged together and Meredith knew that Lexie knew it too.

"Don't get cold feet now, Lexie. Remember how miserable you were when you weren't with Mark. You made the commitment already a long time ago. The moment you gave him your heart you chose him, Lexie. What happened in the past should show you that no matter how hard you try your heart will always belong to him." Meredith told her emphatically, trying to show Lexie that she didn't even have another choice than to marry him. That it was the only choice that made any sense.

"It's just ... it's scary, Meredith. I'm terrified. What if he hurts me again?" Lexie asked with a small voice, unshed tears shining in her eyes.

Of course Meredith knew that Mark and Lexie had an extremely bumpy history. They had hurt each other more than once but she was still certain that they could make it work. They couldn't live without each other anyway.

"Lexie, he is definitely going to hurt you at one time or another. That's life. No one is perfect. You just have to try so that the good times outweigh the bad times. You can't avoid the bad times. They'll always be there. Marriage just means that it should be harder to bail the moment times are getting rough. So just ask yourself this. Do you want to bail again?"

"No way. I love him, Meredith. And I want all this. The good _and_ the bad times. As long as it means that I can be with him." Lexie replied without any doubt in her voice and a big smile appeared on Meredith's face.

"So that's your answer."

"Thanks, Meredith. Apparently I just needed a pep talk."

"Any time, Lexie. That's what big sisters are for, right?" Meredith said, enfolding Lexie in an embrace.

"I guess." Lexie murmured into Meredith's shoulder and they remained in each others' arms for a few more seconds before Meredith released her.

"So let's see if we forgot anything before Derek drops Mark off."

~M&L~

When Mark entered the apartment and closed the door behind him, he already wanted to switch on the lights when he realized that the apartment wasn't dark. When he looked around surprised, he saw that there were candles on every surface and Lexie was standing in the middle of the apartment. Slightly confused Mark couldn't utter a word.

"I know you hate surprises but I hope that you don't mind this one. It was actually Meredith's idea. Not that she pressured me or anything like it. She just gave me the idea and told me that I shouldn't be such a coward." Lexie rambled away, barely taking in air between the sentences. "So I thought I just risk it and go with it. Hoping that you wouldn't mind. But maybe it was a bad idea. I should have ..."

"Wha...?" Mark tried to interrupt her but Lexie didn't give him a chance to speak.

"No. You know what? I'm not gonna chicken out here. So I just get it out and wait for your answer."

Mark's eyes widened in complete astonishment when Lexie got down on one knee with the ring box in her hand and it took his brain a few seconds to process what he was seeing. When he realized what this whole setting was about his jaw dropped down.

"Oh my ..." Mark whispered, looking at Lexie in complete disbelief. Not sure if he could trust his eyes or if this was all a dream. But when Lexie started to speak he locked eyes with her, holding his breath in anticipation of what would come.

"We broke up twice and tried to live without each other. It didn't work. And when we finally realized that we can only live with each other in our lives, that we have to make it work, you had the accident. I thought I'd lost you forever... I ... " Lexie gulped hard to suppress the tears from rising, staring at Mark who was still standing dumbfounded in front of the kitchen counter. "Mark, you are the love of my life and ... " Lexie couldn't hold back the tears any longer and started to sob. "Damn, there is a reason why girls don't do this."

Lexie's tears set Mark in motion and he hurried over to join her on the floor. Tearing up himself, he took her hands into his and squeezed them tightly.

"Okay, I'll do it. You ... " Overwhelmed by emotions Mark had difficulties to hold the tears in check that threatened to spill over. "Wait, I can do this." He cleared his throat briefly and inhaled deeply before he could continue.

"You are the most extraordinary woman I've ever met. From the moment you rushed into my hotel room you never ceased to amaze me. You were the one who believed in me. You were the one who put me back together. You make me happier then anything I've ever known and if I can have a part in making you happy that's all I wanna do. That's all I wanna do for the rest of my life. Make you happy."

Lexie smiled happily up to him through the tears that were still falling down her cheeks and Mark paused briefly to pick up the ring box from the floor where Lexie had dropped it the moment Mark kneeled in front of her. He pulled the ring out carefully and held it in her direction. Taking in a deep breath Mark looked Lexie directly in the eyes before he finally asked the question. "I love you, Lexie. With all my heart. Will you marry me?"

"Yes. Oh my god, yes." Lexie replied enthusiastically and threw herself into Mark's arms. Mark wrapped his arms tightly around her, a big silly grin on his face. He would finally marry the only woman he wanted to share the rest of his life with.

Releasing her out of his arms, Mark bent down and kissed her slowly before he took her hand in his and slipped the engagement ring on her finger. Lexie gazed down at her intertwined hands, still a little overwhelmed by the fact that she was now engaged. Locking eyes with Mark, she leaned forward and sealed his lips with hers.

"I love you, Mark. You just made me the happiest woman on this planet."

"That's the goal."

Standing up he took Lexie's hand in his and pulled her up from the floor. Mesmerized Mark stood frozen in place for a few seconds as he looked at his soon-to-be wife. Her eyes were still glistened with tears, her cheeks still wet, but her whole face was split up by the biggest smile he had ever seen on her and he felt a tug where his heart was. He didn't deserve her but apparently he was the one who put that smile on her face by asking her to marry him. She chose him. Forever.

Trembling slightly Lexie lifted her hand and caressed Mark's scruff. She didn't deserve him but apparently he wanted to be with her for the rest of his life. Mark leaned his cheek deeper into her hand and closed his eyes for a few seconds, still a look of pure astonishment on his face. When he opened his blue eyes again, a big smile suddenly erupted on his face and Lexie's heart skipped a beat. He would marry her. He chose her. Forever.

Mark reached up with his hand and took Lexie's in his, turning his head to give her palm a brief peck before he walked towards the couch, taking her with him. When he sat down he pulled her down on his lap and Lexie leaned her head on his shoulder, beginning to draw random patterns on his shirt with her finger, feeling the warmth of his body through the thin material.

"So that's it? We are really doing this?" Lexie broke suddenly the silence, startling Mark slightly and he stopped trailing his fingers up and down her arm.

"What? Are you already changing your mind?" Mark asked only half-joking, still afraid that this all could turn out to be a dream after all. Lexie shifted her head so that she could look him in the eyes and the expression on her face made him sigh with relief. No. She wouldn't run.

"No. Of course not. It's just ... it's a little surreal, don't you think? It seems like yesterday when I told you that I would move in with you in about ten years and look at us now." Lexie explained hesitantly.

"Lex, you can never plan every little detail of your life. Of course you have goals and imagine ways to achieve them. But life isn't that easy. Life plans can change. I should know what I'm talking about. After all you were the one who turned my world upside down."

Mark cradled her cheek in his hand and rubbed his thumb slowly over her smooth skin, smiling contentedly. Averting her gaze, Lexie started to fumble with the collar of his shirt, tracing a finger along the edges, feeling his pulse beating under her fingers.

"I was so sure that we aren't compatible because we are at different places in our life. But it turned out that being at different places isn't that important."

"How so? This argument is what has torn us apart twice. What has changed?" Mark asked her curiously, the last break-up still fresh in his mind.

"I realized that it doesn't really matter at which places we are in our lives because ..." Lexie stopped the movement of her fingers and stared up to him, her eyes full of love. "I love you, Mark Sloan. It's that simple. And true love conquers all, right?"

"Right." Mark leaned down and kissed her softly. When he released her lips he could see that Lexie was tearing up again and tried to lighten the mood. After all being engaged a reason to be happy not sad. It took them long enough to get to this point.

"Even me marrying a fetus." Mark joked, his eyes sparkling with mischievousness.

"Hey! Watch your mouth." Lexie giggled happily and smacked him playfully over his chest. But the moment her hand came to rest on his stomach all playfulness was gone in a second. When they locked eyes they both inhaled sharply seeing the hunger and desire in each others' eyes and Lexie leaned forward to press her lips on his, mumbling while her teeth nibbled on his bottom lip.

"Will this ever go away?" Mark swept his tongue into her mouth and gave her a toe-curling kiss that made her cheeks flush with growing desire before he kissed a path along her jaw line until he reached her ear.

"What do you mean?" Mark whispered, nibbling playfully on her ear lobe. Lexie inhaled a shuddering breath and it took her a few seconds until she remembered what they were talking about.

"This. One second we have a normal conversation and in the next second I want to rip your clothes off. Will we ever get enough of each other?" Lexie buried her hands in his hair and pulled Mark's head carefully back so that she could look into his eyes.

"Never." Mark answered determinedly before he captured her lips again to kiss her senseless. Before Lexie could lose every coherent thought she murmured between the kisses.

"Promise?"

"Promise."

"How can you be so sure?" Lexie asked and Mark stopped kissing her when he realized that she wouldn't give up until they got this settled.

"Experience! We were never able to keep our hands to each other even when we had a big fight. Imagine all the great make-up sex." To prove his point Mark slipped his hand under her shirt, caressing her stomach.

"I know there is no reason to have make-up sex. But what do you say to normal sex?" Lexie smiled mischievously at him, already beginning to unbutton his shirt.

"Lex, we will never have normal sex. It'll always be amazingly, mind-blowingly fantastic. So there is your compatibility. We just fit." Mark replied smugly and Lexie looked up at him in feigned shock.

"That was dirty." Lexie scolded him playfully, suppressing a smile.

"I have no idea what you are talking about?" Mark replied sanctimoniously.

"Admit it. You are as dirty minded as I am and you were talking about the same place I'm thinking about right now."

"And which place would that be?"

"Hmm, let's see." Lexie stood up and straddled him, pressing herself against him. "You in me." She whispered just above his lips before she closed the gap and kissed him softly.

"I like this place." Mark mumbled under her lips. Cradling her face between his hands, he kissed her thoroughly until they both needed to come up for air.

Suddenly Lexie stood up and stretched out her hand. Pulling Mark of the couch, they walked to the bed room to celebrate the engagement in their own unique way. With mind-blowingly fantastic sex.

~M&L~

Mind-blowingly fantastic seemed to be not sufficient enough to describe what just had happened. When Mark was finally able to move again, he realized that Lexie most likely had difficulties to breath because he collapsed completely on top of her. He lifted himself up with some effort and looked down at her. She lay wide-eyed beneath him and a sudden fear rose in him that she had really stopped breathing but only a second later Lexie blinked and licked her lips, trying to say something but wasn't able to. She took in a deep breath and finally found her voice again even though the words only came out in a hoarse whisper.

"Wow ... that was ..." Lexie trailed off and stretched herself like a cat, a big smile on her face. Mark felt her body wiggle under him and if he wouldn't have been so exhausted he would have had sex with her again. Having sex with Lexie was like a drug and he was definitely an addict. But his body was spent, for now anyway, and reluctantly Mark slipped out of her and slumped on the bed beside her. Lexie immediately curled into his side and Mark searched with his fingers for the sheet to pull it over them.

"It was ... pretty intense?" Mark tried to come up with the right term, though he wasn't sure if you could describe with words what just happened.

"I don't even know if intense covers it completely."

"Not even mind-blowingly fantastic?" Lexie could hear the smirk in his voice and had to smile herself. She loved it when Mark called their love making like that. Normally it was a pretty accurate description but this time it had been different. Lexie propped up her head on her folded hands so that she could look into Mark's face.

"Nope. I never had such an intense orgasm before. I can't believe that there are people who think that you can have amazing sex without having feelings for the other person."

"Well, you can have amazing sex without feelings involved." Mark answered her.

"I agree, but not this kind of sex." Lexie insisted and Mark had to admit that she was right.

"I know, Lex. I don't know how to describe it either. A while back I heard some guy on a TV show explain it as making love. Breaking the laws of physics. The moment when two people become one. I think it's pretty accurate."

Lexie's eyes widened in surprise when she realized about which TV show Mark was talking about.

"Wow … since when do you watch Bones?"

"Bones? Never heard of it." Mark replied, avoiding her eyes. He didn't want to admit that he had already watched TV shows with the nurses more than once. He did it only when he had to stay at the hospital over night, so he was pretty sure that no one noticed it anyway and surprisingly the nurses had kept their mouths shut about it until now. Maybe because of the donuts and cups of Starbucks coffee he brought them on the mornings after they had watched an episode of some ridiculously sappy TV show together.

"Yeah, right. It was the speech Booth gave Brennan to explain to her the difference between crappy sex and making love. You can't fool me. The nurses love this show. I don't even know how often they already talked about this special scene. But I have to admit it's very romantic."

Mark knew he wouldn't get out of this one so he decided that it was better to tell Lexie a half-truth. Otherwise she would mock him for weeks.

"Well, I walked in when they watched the episode one day and I needed a break anyway and it was quite amusing with the whole role playing."

"Hmm, do you want me to play a slutty nurse?" Lexie batted her eye lashes at him and continued with a high pitched voice. "Of course, Dr. Sloan. Anything you like. I'm a great admirer of your work. The things you do with your hands. I heard so much about your success."

"Now _you_ are talking dirty." Mark couldn't help to smile at Lexie's attempt to play a slutty nurse.

"What? You _are_ great with your hands." Lexie replied innocently.

"You were not talking about my patients."

"Not?"

"No. Should I show you how good I can be with my hands?" Mark asked her, his hand already slipping around her waist. But Lexie stopped his hand with her own, looking up at him sheepishly.

"Is it embarrassing that I have to come back to your offer later? I can't move."

"Well, maybe I have to find a slutty nurse then."

"Don't you dare. The only people you are allowed to put your hands on are your patients and me. Your fiancée." Lexie lifted her head from her hands and wagged her left hand in front of his face. "See. I have proof. You are mine."

"Did no one ever tell you that you can't own people?" Mark shook his head slightly in disbelief.

"You are still mine. Want to deny it?" Lexie asked him provocatively.

"No. I would be lying if I would deny it. But it works both ways."

"I'm yours?"

"Yeah, Lex. You and me. I'm yours and you are mine. Together forever. As husband and wife."

"Together forever." Lexie sighed contentedly and lay her head back on his chest. Listening to Mark's heart beat, she looked at the engagement ring on her finger until she couldn't keep her eyes open any longer and drifted off to sleep.

Mark lay his hand carefully on top of hers, feeling the ring under his fingers, listening to Lexie's even breaths. Closing his eyes, Mark wrapped his arm around her and dropped a light kiss on her forehead, murmuring just above a whisper before he followed Lexie into a peaceful sleep.

"I have everything I always wanted."

* * *

><p><strong>The end<strong>

**For those of you who didn't recognize the scene (though I'm sure most of you did), I used the proposal scene between Monica and Chandler from "Friends" as a guideline. And I couldn't resist to sneak in a Bones reference too. Well, I'm a TV addict. I can't help it. And of course there is a M-version of this chapter. :D**

**That's it. The end of my first Mark/Lexie story. I hope you all enjoyed the ride. I definitely enjoyed writing it. Big thank you to all of you who took the time to leave a review. It was very much appreciated. Hopefully I'll see you all soon with a new story. But I'm pretty sure not until next year. So...**

**To all of you who celebrate it, Merry Christmas and to everyone a Happy New Year! Hopefully the new year will bring us the Mark and Lexie reunion.**


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